It's a Thornton Thing

Texas Flag Quilt

2011-11-22T08:31:00.000-08:00

Kyle and I have been wanting a Texas Flag to hang in our spare bedroom. I imagine it hanging in Kyle's office one day, or in our son's room. So, Dad let us have one of his Texas flags that he got when he was stationed in San Angelo, and when I told Kyle that it had actually flown over the capital, he was pretty impressed. Mom and I spent a few hours yesterday making the flag into a quilt to hang on the wall. That way it has a little more softness and home-like feel to it.

I started with a white sheet.

And of course, a Texas flag.

A new haircut doesnt hurt, either.

I used leftover burlap ribbon to make three loops at the top to hang it from.

Then I hung it from a curtain rod to see if it will hang right. Can't wait to see how it looks on our wall at home!

Making a Texas Christmas Wreath

2011-11-20T18:41:00.001-08:00

Since I have fallen in love with a Texan, I have wanted nothing more than to fill our home with things that remind me of him and his cultural roots, which I plan to give to my children one day. (the roots, that is).

So here is my Texas take on a Christmas wreath.

I started with a naked wreath. $4 at Christmas Tree Shops

Of course, I had to have a Texas star. $4 at Michaels. (It was actually made at a shop in Irving, Texas. So I felt good about my choice).

Next, I chose a rick-rack ribbon with an irridescent shimmer. This is to wrap around the wreath. $2 at Michaels.

As for the ribbon for the large bow at the base of the wreath, I selected a burlap ribbon with some awesome detail and texture to it. It's definately not your typical Christmas ribbon. $3.50 at Michaels.

The final touch was a set of jingle bells with a more brushed metal look to them. I didn't want the bright, shiny colors; rather, I found something more country. These were the most expensive item, but since I only used 12 on the wreath, I have eight left over, which I intend to hang on my tree with twine. $6 at Michaels.

The part that took me the longest was the large burlap ribbon. I had never done one before, so I YouTubed it. Here's a close-up of the wreath all finished.

Gush

2011-10-24T17:25:00.000-07:00

Ohmygosh. I just loved today. It counted as a work day, but I went to a class at a Holiday Inn in Orlando for a foodhandler safety course which lasted many long hours. However, it did not last nearly as many hours as a usual day at my crap job, so it was awesome. Reasons why it was awesome:

1) I wore my argyle sweater. I love! my argyle sweater. It's comfy and gray and purple and adorable, and I don't wear it to my crap job because I could get crap on it. Which leads me to my next point.
2) There was no food there! The proctor of the class apologized for the lack of food and said we would have a lunch break to go get something to eat after the first three hours of the class, but I loved the fact that there was no food. I hate food. I'm around it all day! And it tends to soil my sweaters. Ah, glorious foodlessness.
3) I got to make posters, like in high school. We were given our pick of colored markers and giant pieces of paper and were told to draw visual aids of different food-borne illnesses from the videos we were watching and being tested on. I was the ONLY one enjoying myself. And my partner was sort of quietly giggling at my artistic endevors, so I think he enjoyed himself too. But I drew a jaundiced cook and a shrimp with hepatitis A, and presented them to the 'class' after which no one applauded or even cracked a smile. But I loved it. I think I get it from my mom, the fact that I could have cared less if no one else loved the activity. How often do you get paid to make stupid posters?

Okay, so afterwards when I got home, Kyle took me shopping to Hobby Lobby where we bought a star for our Christmas tree. Then we had dinner and I ordered STEAK! and the best cream spinach (and only) cream spinach I have ever had.

It was an awesome day. And tomorrow, I work the day shift, so I get to be home in the evening like a normal American woman.

And I mentioned to Kyle the other day that I had always imagined that when I was married I would have a vanity to set up beautifully and keep my girly things. So he bought me this! and hung my antique mirror above it. (ignore what you see in the mirror, it is currently the ironing room.

Awesome day off

2011-09-28T16:49:00.000-07:00

Today was awesome. It started with bible study then lunch by the beach. Then we went bike-riding around downtown Titusville. We got some awesome use out of my new camera!

Look what Kyle bought me :) hahaha

My handsome hubby on the dock :)

The day ended with swimming and dinner at McDonalds :)

rough road

2011-09-23T13:13:00.000-07:00

I tried to blog a couple times while I had a cast on my arm, but one-handed typing is exhausting and frustrating. So, I always gave up. But now that the cast is gone, I have to work on flexibility, and flattening my wrist enough to type is a great exercise, so here it goes.

Where to begin. I have been studying Romans at my womens bible study on Wednesdays, and in my alone time, I have been reading about Paul's thorn, which he asked God to remove from him 3 different times. But God left that thorn in Paul's life, whatever it was--physical ailment, bad relationship--it's not specified. But every time I read the description of a thorn, I think of my current job situation. It drains me, it causes me to lose sleep, it makes me feel inferior and lost and scared. I know none of these feelings are from God, so that means Satan is supplying them, right? So why does Satan have such a hold on my life right now? Why can I walk around work smiling and greeting people with my outgoing personality, then cry myself into exhaustion every night at the thought of going back?

It's a rough road I'm on, and Kyle is right there with me. He sees (and is forced to hear) my pain, and he is growing into a wonderfully supportive husband as a result. He has a tendency to brush negativity off with sayings like, "That's life," or "It's a job, it's supposed to make you miserable," but when I told him how much those things make me feel hopeless, he has really risen to the occasion. The other night was especially horrible. I couldn't get work off my mind. It was also my day off and I had just had my cast removed, so my doctor had said that I needed to take a bath and work out my arm underwater. So while I was having a meltdown at 10 o'clock at night, Kyle ran me a bubble bath and put votive candles all around it. He really doesn't want me to feel this way, and niether does God. So I just have to remember that this is my thorn, and as much as God wants to remove it, and my husband wants to drown my sorrows in a bubble bath, I have to remember that when I am ready, God will remove me from this rough road. And until then, I will try to be the best version of myself.

On a positive note, I bought my plane tickets to go to Texas for the birth of my niece. Four whole days of my three favorite things: Texas, sister(s) and traveling will be a much-needed break from the mutiny of my thorn issue. And after that, I have Thanksgiving to look forward to, for which I will be traveling to Georgia! I know that the remaineder of this year will fly by. Living day off to day off really eats up the weeks and blends them into a mushy memory of "what just happened??" And today is my day off, so I plan to get my nails done, orgainize our dvd collection, and make boring calls to my insurance providers.

Location Guilt

2011-07-24T18:29:00.000-07:00

I feel guilty for living in Florida quite often. Doesn't that stink? The other night I left work around 1 am and thought, "I'm 6 or 7 miles from the beach right now. I should go and listen to the waves." But you know what I would rather do at that time of night? I would rather go home to my sleeping husband, eat a sandwich and watch Netflix until I settle down. That sucks! So many people go their whole lives never seeing the ocean, never smelling the salt and letting the sand burn their toes. I love the beach with all that is in me, but by the time I have packed my bags, driven there, set up my towel and sun-blocked myself, I feel like I could have done a million other more important things. I promise myself that when school is over (in 2 weeks) I will go to the beach on my days off from work. Two whole days each week to spend doing things like taking pictures with my graduation present (a nikon D3000) and tanning and cleaning and reading my bible and praising God with my guitar.

If someone came running up to me today and said, "It's terrible that you live this close to the beach and don't go every weekend!" I would throw my arms up and say, "I know!" But on the other hand I know that feeling guilty about this is silly because it's not like I sit around looking for something to fill up my time. I sit around filling my time wishing I could empty it a little bit. So, there you have it. My location guilt. Now back to writing a critical comparison/contrast essay on a common theme represented in African American literature.

manager in training

2011-06-14T19:46:00.000-07:00

Ever since Kyle decided not to join the army, I have been in full-out work mode. Good thing for me, I have God on my side and he put all the pieces together to have my boss offer me a full-time salary position at my current restauraunt job just a few days after Kyle dropped the bomb about dropping out of his pre-committment to the army.

Today was my first day of manager training, and I'm pretty sure that my favorite part about today was not having to wear my bowtie and apron. I wore a nice purple tailored shirt and black dress slacks. And all my work friends called me "Manager Cara" and laughed at me. I'm so excited to finally be changing and moving up. The benefits and all the positive aspects of this job are really in the forefront of my mind right now, so I'm very optomisitic about the future of this job. This weekend Kyle and I are moving into our new TWO BEDROOM apartment, which will be a nice change from our NO BEDROOM studio apartment that we are living in now. Work at 8 in the morning and once again I didn't get my homework done tonight. What's new? Six more weeks and I will be a degree-holding, restaurant-running, awesome apartment-renting woman!

Goodnight!!

Anniversary Video

2011-05-31T16:01:00.000-07:00

A Year

2011-05-31T03:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was mine and Kyle's 1-year anniversary. We spent the entire weekend celebrating, though. Here is how our weekend transpired.

Saturday morning we left bright and early for Walmart where we got gas and a tire gauge to make sure my tires were ready for a 2.5 hour trip. When we got to Tampa around 10 am, we went straight to Busch Gardens and bought our tickets. They have a deal where you buy a one-day pass for $77 and you come back free for the rest of the year. We rode ride after ride and ate our smuggled sandwiches (because we would rather eat normal-priced food on dates and pass up $15 chicken fingers and corn dogs). The check-in time for our lovely Sheraton Suites hotel room was at 3pm, so that's when we left the park with plans to return the next day. We unloaded our baggage, showered, jumped on the amazingly soft bed, explored the hotel which had rivers and water-falls flowing through its spacious lobby, then we decided to find a place for dinner. Here's where we made a mistake. We used the Yellow Pages App on my iPhone to find good Mexican Restaurants in our area, when it turned out that Yellow Pages sucks because certain restaurants aren't appropriately labeled "In the Ghetto" when they truly are in the Ghetto. So we drove fifteen minutes through the wrong side of town to find that the plaza where Yellow Pages suggested we eat was a scary area and the restaurant had been closed down long ago because there was no sign of it. We drove back to the hotel, our blood sugar dropping by the second, and tried driving in the other direction without the help of Yellow Pages. After passing a few strip clubs I saw a Dillards off in the distance...a Mall!! "People like me shop there!" is what I shouted as I sped through its parking lot to see a Macy's and all the other normal department stores that a mall has to offer. When we got through the mall there was even a Tiffany & co! I have never seen such beautiful rings, except the one on my left hand. Our GPS told us that this mall had a Cheesecake Factory in it, and sure enough there was a whole out-door dining city outside the foodcourt complete with a pub, a trendy music restaurant with a hip-hop performer, a Champps Bar and Grille, which is where we ate that first night, and a few other adorable restaurants. We decided to save Cheesecake Factory for the next night when we were actually gonna exchange our anniversary cards and get all dressed up. So the next day was a typical day at a theme park. We slept in and didn't reach the park until around noon and left around 5 to go on our fancy date to where I got Chipotle Spicy Chicken Pasta and Kyle had Shrimp and Chicken Gumbo and we ordered a slice of Adam's Peanutbutter Cup Cheesecake, which also included Butterfinger pieces and caramel in the center. Yum! Each night was capped off with lying bed watching cable on our giant flat-screen tv. We have a new fave show--parking wars. We watched like, 3 hours of it that night after hanging out in the hotel lounge for a hour. By the third day, we checked out of our hotel around 8 and got to Busch Gardens just as it opened. We were able to ride 4 rides without any lines, and then we left for Orlando where we went shopping and had lunch and Kyle even surprised me by taking me to my favorite diner where I ordered my peanut butter and chocolate shake ane he ordered his vanilla malt. It was a perfect weekend filled with fun and a ton of sleep. I knew it would all go by so fast and that I would be sad when it was over. That's why I took pictures!

This picture was taken just before we left for the scary Mexican restuarant that didn't exist.

Kyle and I before our special date where he made me cry with the love-note he wrote me.

Our Cheesecake

Our delicious milkshakes

Posterity

2011-04-18T21:04:00.000-07:00

I like to blog every now and then for my own sake. To go back in time and read about a time where I felt like the mole hill before me was a mountain and realize that it really was a mole hill is, well, fun.

Today I had my last advising appointment. I read the three little words I have been working toward for four years. They were in type-writer font at the top of my degree audit and they were: "ALL REQUIREMENTS MET."

That means I have either taken, am taking, or have signed up to take everything I need to graduate. And it feels good. But not too good. Now is the time to panic. I have to put together two portfolios of the work I have done this semester. One nonfiction, one fiction. I have to create a "published" book from the short story that mom wrote, and I have to ace my Spanish final. Tonight I watched Tangled and got nothing done. So, I guess tomorrow is the time to panic!

But on a non-school note, we got our lease extended until November so there is no question as to where we will be living after August arrives. Even though things are changing all around me, I feel like I'm watching it all from the sidelines and haven't been swept up into the madness yet.

Here I come, madness.

It's Official

2011-04-15T07:50:00.000-07:00

One weeek ago, Kyle joined the United States Army. It all happened so fast, that other than the fact that he talks incessently about the Army, it doesn't quite feel real yet. Today he drove 3 hours north to Georgia to get a free dental check-up from his step-grandpa who own his own practice up there, rather than pay $200 for a check up from the local dentist. Everything is in preparation for boot camp these days. I can't believe it's still 7 months away.

In a couple of weeks school will be over and we'll start summer classes. Kyle will finish his associates after taking biology and an elective and I will have my B.A. The living situation is giving me a headache lately. We lose our lease in August and Kyle doesn't leave until November. What to do? We're going to ask our landlord if he will extend the lease until the end of the year, then I will just stay with Mom and Dad until boot camp is over. But if the landlord says no, which I suspect he will, then we will be looking for a short-term option. "Live with your parents!" is what everyone tells me. But I feel that we would be imposing on their burdenless existence by sluffing all of out belongings in and invading their space, not to mention that Kyle and I aren't used to abiding by anyone's schedule except our own, and it's quite a strange schedule. We stay up late watching movies and eat dinner at 9 o'clock at night. I work until the wee hours of the morning on weekends and he wakes up at the wee hours of the morning all week. We would drive my early-to-bed-early-to-rise parents bananas. Eh, I give up for now.

It's official. Life is about to get difficult.

I had already poured the milk...

2011-03-28T20:13:00.000-07:00

Today was one of those Mondays that make people hate Mondays. Maybe if every Monday was sunny yet cool and everyone got a paid vactaion from work and babies didn't cry and keys didn't disappear at the worst possible moment, maybe then Mondays wouldn't get such a bad rap.

But today was a Monday you hope to live to tell about.

This weekend we house-sat for mom and dad while they were on a youth retreat. Sunday night at 10 o'clock I checked my school email to find a brand new email sent 20 minutes prior from the professor of my Monday morning class. It said, "Be sure to do the reading, we may have a quiz." (That means there will be a quiz without a doubt). Realizing that I had left the necessary book at my apartment, I resolved to wake up half and hour early and go to my apartment to get it, do the reading and be on time to ace my quiz. But Monday had other plans. I stayed up too late because I was wired from the weekend. Kyle woke me up at 7:30 and again at 8:30 to chat, and I was an angry monster when I woke up. I couldn't find a shirt to wear amidst the mess of our poor packing skills. And it was raining. I got into my car to go to my apartment. When I pulled into my apartment and pulled out my keys, I noticed my key ring was broken and one of my house keys had fallen off. I emptied my purse hoping it had fallen off in there. No such luck. Thankfully Kyle showed up 20 minutes later to get his truck so he could load up all of the clean laundry and food we had left at mom and dad's. But now I had no time to do the reading. When I got into the apartment, the book was nowhere to be found. We searched everywhere and I cried out of frustration.
"This is the worst Monday ever!" I cried into Kyle's shoulder.
"Sh*t happens, Boo," he said, lovingly. "Your teacher will understand that you had a rough morning and can't take the quiz."
"I don't want her to think I'm a bad student. The quiz is only worth 5 points but it's the principle."
So, I drove to school and about 10 minutes out of town I got a call from Kyle.
"Hey, I found your book. It's here on your dad's desk."
Great. It was at my parents' house the whole time. Wow. Hello, Monday.
School went decently. Oh, except that I walked in flipflops through the puddles and spent 20 minutes meandering through the parking garage trying to remember where I parked. I got 3/5 points on the quiz, which isn't terrible considering I am an A student otherwise. But when I got home from school is when the crap started again.
"The building manager said we've been having power surges and there's nothing they can do to stop them. That's why our milk went bad early last week and my alarm clock keeps unsetting itself," Kyle told me as I walked in the door, soaking wet from having forgotten my umbrella.
I tried to make a grilled-cheese sandwich, but the stove was having so many surges, that it took 20 minutes of grilling it on high to get the bread slightly browned. And another gallon of milk had gone bad over the weekend. Thankfully it was only partially filled. Oh, and I bought yogurt on the way home. Yummy. That'll rot in a few hours.
"Oh, and the internet is down do to the surges, so you can't do any homework," Kyle says.
Wow. I called mom and dad to ask if we could stay at their house until the power was back on but it came back on after a little while and I was appeased.
I guess the day rounded itself out when I fell asleep and missed the delicious salmon Kyle made so I resorted to the last bowl of Golden Grahams. As I poured the milk, I reached into the drawer for a spoon. No spoons. By the time I wash a spoon, the cereal will be soggy. Then there will be no more Grahams and I will have to eat generic cheerios (Honey spooners).
"There are no spoons?" I asked.
"Not if you didn't do the dishes."
"Why is it only me who can do dishes?"
"It's not. It's just, you didn't wash any, so there are no spoons."

Thankfully Kyle bought me a slice of Pizza at our fave pizza place then we snuck it into a movie that was very funny. (Paul, the one about the alien) Now Kyle's sleeping, I'm doing homework that I put off because the day was so horrible I didn't want to make it worse by having to think, and I am very glad that today is over.

Oh, and the printer is out of ink so I can't print out my assignment that makes up 75% of my final grade. Yippeeee!!!

The Night We Were Babysitters

2011-03-10T20:53:00.000-08:00

Every time I tried to upload pictures from Christmas onto Facebook, the uploader would take hours then freeze up and quit. But now it's the last night of Spring Break 2011 and probably the last quiet moment I'll have for a while and I'm putting them up. But here are a few from the night we babysat while the Koper sisters went on a double-date.

Nolan spend the entire time watching our movie and bowling in the hallway, also he almost fell asleep in Grammy's arms. I guess all those pictures are on mom's camera. But here are the ones that we got.

Here's Jack eating what was supposed to be Nolan's dinner, but we tried with little avail to get Nolan to eat lots of things in his food group. But Jack was willing to help!

Here I found Gabby and Jack laying down with uncle Kyle. Before they saw the camera, they were both sucking their thumbs and Kyle was chatting with them.

Here we are trying to take piggy-back pictures, but uncle Kyle isn't at his best.

This one turned out nicely.

Peninsula Island

2011-03-07T14:45:00.000-08:00

Today is the first day of Spring Break for me (Kyle's isn't unti the end of the month) and I can't help thinking about the fact that I would usually be going to visit Holly this week. Last year I didn't because she was coming down in May for my wedding and she came down with Nolan in the spring, so I didn't feel like I was missing out.

But this year, with graduation coming up and the natural expenditures of wedded bliss, I am unable to convince Kyle that it is important for me to go to Texas this week. And though I am very happy for the week off, I do miss the times where I hardly spent my money on anything other than plane tickets to visit my sisters. There was Spring Break, Summer Vacation, Thanksgiving and Christmas. We had some really awesome times, my sisters and I, when I would come out to visit flying solo. I hope those days aren't over yet. Maybe next Spring depending on what job I have, I can come visit everyone.

Just feeling cooped up lately. This town is so small, and I live on a peninsula that feels more like an island. Maybe it really is breaking off from the continental US and floating out into the Atlantic. And no one has noticed yet. Well, I have.

Sigh.

Reflection

2011-02-22T21:46:00.000-08:00

The duties in my life cover a giant bulletin board in my mind.

In my previous (single) life, the bulletin board was made up of school. In each corner, a different class. This class--writewritewrite. This class--study, email professor, post discussion. It was all school.

In my current life, all of the school stuff that used to pretty much make up my entire internal bulletin board is pushed to one corner. Now there is school in one corner, my husband in another, my house in the other, and then my job.

School-still important. Maybe more important because I finally acheived 4.0 status as of last semester (becuase I got two B's my freshman year and one my junior year) and I want to keep that up this semester, my last. However, it's hard to focus on school when I haven't spent any downtime with Kyle, scooped the kitty litter, packed Kyle's lunch, done the dishes, paid the online bills. There is so much more to life than school, I am realizing.

My house--Yeah, Cara, don't you mean your tiny apartment? Well, my house gives me a lot to do because I always want it to be clean and organized. If I walk in and smell something funky, I will find it and clean it until the house smells the way it should--clean. And there's no cheating with Febreeze these days. I use chemicals. I cannot get in bed unless things are in their places.

Husband--this is obvious. He works twice the hours I do and goes to school, too. He deserves someone to do the little things for him. Lay out his work clothes, pack his lunch, cook a nice dinner and now and then force him to stop talking about money and school and just sit down and watch mindless television. "Honey, go pick out one of your aciton thriller-straight-to-dvd-knock-off-of-original-that-doesn't-even-star-the-action-hero-from-the-first-movie-movies and let's watch it together and eat popcorn." He needs that and so do I sometimes. Bad Boys II... not recommended. XXX II...any action movie starring Ice Cube is an immediate "no." mm-mm, no.

Work--My job never really mattered to me as far as money because I lived at home and new if I ever got sick or had to take a sabatical, mom and dad would help with my car payment and gas money. I mean, I'm a great employee and have never done anything to get into trouble. Don't subscribe to local drama and never upset the guests. But now I work for the money. I don't turn down tables or go on breaks. I don't argue when I have late nights on the weekends because I know those are the weeks where I'll make great money. It has really become work for me and not simply a place I have to be 20 hours a week. I guess the change for me, why it's suddenly more important than before is the fact that now I am contributing to something. I'm helping and it feels good.

I just had to relfect, release some pressure building up in my mind. Now, at 1:03 a.m., I will begin my homework.

Moving day

2011-02-16T20:58:00.000-08:00

It smells more like a hotel than a home. It's a mirror image of our old apartment. It's our new apartment.

This week started wrong. A year ago, our landlord said "if you guys need more than a year, we'll rent to you month-to-month after that." However, on Saturday we found out that he wants us out by March 1st so he can use the unit for business. We spent Saturday evening freaking out and by sunday found our option. Our landlord's brother had a unit two floors down and would rent to us for the five months we needed. So in order to give ourselves time to clean the old place before mid terms, we moved today. Kyle helped for an hour and a half between school and work but the rest of the time it was me taking a shopping cart up the elevator, filling it, bringing it down, emptying it, then making another trip. Tomorrow all I need to get is the Internet stuff, printer and dishes.

Today was the longest day I have had in a while, and in reflection, I would attribute that to the fact that I basically decided this morning that we would move today. I thought, "I will have the electricity turned on for Thursday and we'll move then." but when I called the electric company, the man said no one ever shut the electricity off. So, proactive me thought, "why wait?!"

Pros? Bigger fridge. Remember how the old one crapped out and the new one was doll-sized? Yeah we got the big daddy in this unit.
More pros? Remember the fussy newborn across the hall? The yippy dog next door and the party boys two doors down? No? Well we are one of four units occupied on this floor. All childless and old. Ah, the pros:)
The previous tenants left all their touch up paint and cleaning supplies and the windows and ac unit are properly sealed. Go team!

The cons? The cons. There is no rod in our closet to hang anything from. Oh wait, there is but it's a two feet long tension bar that wouldn't hold ten baby shirts. Also, Stoney is hiding.
It's a day that is so exhausting to the body that the mind can't catch up.
And it's over.

Outward

2011-01-23T19:43:00.001-08:00

I'm actually going to start posting some of my writing assignments as blogs--that's what the Fah-Fah post was all about. Kyle and I don't do anything interesting enough to blog about, but some of these assignments have to do with interesting goings-ons, so enjoy! Here is my homework that is due Tuesday. The assignment was to listen in on a conversation and explain the setting in detail. Mine happened accidentally, of course.

Everything is wooden—the walls, the floor, the shelves piled to the wooden ceiling with knick-knacks, and then of course, the tables. It even smells woody in here. But it begins to smell more like spiced candles and fried food the further I walk. It’s a Cracker Barrel somewhere between Miami and Melbourne. Clutter. Round candies in mason jars, giant pecan-nougat rolls, John Deer paraphernalia, old-fashioned bottled root beer, stuffed animals wearing human clothes, hats that will never be worn (except when my mother talks my dad into trying a few on) and giant checkers on giant checker boards. A plump brunette wearing an oxford shirt in a flattering gray-blue color under her brown apron is smiling with her fingers laced in front of her stomach as she greets us.
“Hi! How are you doing this evening?”
My mother replies as if trying to match the hostess’ chipper tone. “Fine! Thank you for asking.”
My dad is parking the car and my husband has stayed with him. Good thinking. But now I can’t find my mother. I worked at a Cracker Barrel six years ago when I was a sophomore in high school and never could find a good enough reason to come back. Yet here we are. Over the speaker they’re playing a canned rendition of a bluegrass song. It literally sounds as if someone is singing into a tin can—a song about someone named “Bo Jangles.” And my dad sings the same line about this fellow, Bo Jangles all throughout dinner. My mother covers his mouth with her hand and laughs. There’s no music playing in the restaurant portion of the Barrel. A medley of voices and forks scraping plates and ice clinking in glasses is the music instead—thank God. My dad spends the meal—when he’s not singing about Bo Jangles—talking about the number of stars on each server’s apron. While my parents are in line at the register when the meal is finally over, I make my way to the bathroom before the last leg of our trip begins. We don’t want to have to stop with only an hour or so left on the road.
The bathroom is bright. A blue glow from a flickering fluorescent bulb casts an unkind light on the already unforgiving surfaces of the white countertops around the sink which are covered in murky puddles of water. The silver soap dispensers are caked with pink suds. The sink is stained brown around the drain. The music is louder in here and that song about Bo Jangles is on again—or still, maybe. I would rather hold my bladder for an hour. The only stall available is the middle of the three. I kick the pale door in with my cowboy boot to see a toilet that looks as if it hasn’t yet been abused by a careless patron. But the germs are invisible, I know. As I latch the stall door with the very tiniest tip of my left pinky finger I noticed the shoes on the right side of me. They are shiny, gold and strappy, stretched over wrinkled toes and a taupe-colored toenail polish. I suspect the feet belong to one of the women of the Red Had Society. On my way to the restroom I saw them finishing their meal at a large table on the far wall by the hostess stand. Now the women on either side of me seem to know one another. I listen.
“I’m going to try one of these and see if I can flush it down the toilet,” the one on the left says, sounding just as old as the feet to my right look. I have no idea what she’s referring to. I am afraid to wonder.
“I tried three and dropped the first two into the toilet just trying to get them out,” says the one to my right.
I imagine the two women fumbling with the crepe-thin toilet seat covers and relax as I come to understand the conversation I’ve now been thrust in the middle of. A loud noise comes from the left stall. I cringe.
“Oh, excuse me,” says the left stall.
“Oh, it’s okay. I did the same thing earlier,” replies the stall to the right.
I’m glad to have missed that.
“Well I haven’t gone all day and now that we’ve been here I’ve gone twice,” says the left stall.
“Well, you know how it goes. Once you start you just can’t stop.”
“Yeah, you’re right.”
I burst out of the stall and wash my hands as thoroughly as if I could wash away everything I’ve just heard.
My family is waiting at the front door by the country music c.d. display and my mother and I run to the car, screaming about the chill in the air now that night has fallen, leaving our husbands jogging to keep up.
“Don’t worry mom,” I say, looking over at her in our sprint to the car. “I’ll warm you up with the conversation I just heard in the bathroom.”

80's movies I love

2011-01-23T14:33:00.001-08:00

I have been brainstorming birthday ideas and I thought, "what could bring life-long joy to me and my family?" And I got it. There are a few 80's movies I adore. Why didn't I think of this sooner? Here they are, starting with the most awesome.
1. Pretty Woman

2. The Breakfast Club

3. Dirty Dancing

4. Working Girl

5. Ferris Bueller's Day Off

6. Big

Fah-Fah

2011-01-19T16:42:00.000-08:00

I know exactly where it is. I could be sitting 1,000 miles from that tiny, crammed apartment. But I could still tell you exactly where to find it. We have a lot of stuff in our one-room, one-closet home. In the closet there’s a washer unit I don’t know how to use, there’s my husband’s Easter basket from last year that my mother insisted on buying “her Easter-basketless son-in-law.” I’m getting warmer. There’s a trophy my husband won at a horse-shoe throwing competition. It’s appropriately made out of horse-shoes. A tiny horse-shoe man throwing an even tinier horse-shoe. Where do you get such a tiny horse-shoe? Where the heck am I supposed to put this thing? And then there it is.

It is my childhood blanket. Its name is “Fah-Fah.” Or is it? Was Fah-Fah a name or simply a word followed by “my” from back before I knew how to say the word “blanket”? I don’t know who gave it to me how long ago. I could call my mom and ask. The name still stands. Within the last few years I remember my sister asking me, “Do you still have your Fah-Fah?” Yeah, I do.

When I’m holding it, still folded in my arms, I’m afraid to turn the halves into a whole and look at its faded entirety because I know what I’ll see. It’s thin. But it was always thin. It wasn’t designed for warmth, I don’t think. But now when I hold it up to the light I’m almost sure I could read through its faded white background. I see the bright yellow trim where there are now only faded beige outlines. Tweety Bird holding his pastel-colored balloons is only a faded injustice of what he was my entire childhood. And when I run my polished fingertips over the split in the bottom right-hand corner I am back in that summer evening. Or was it summer? It was warm and the yards were green and the wide, black street was clear enough for a bunch of us kids to be having a race on it. On overseas Air Force bases every kid knows each other. Or at least they think they know. I don’t know about Navy or Army bases. My sisters and I had the best wagon on the block, a Radio Flyer whose red metal bed was far from its rusty days to come. There were at least two neighborhood kids being pulled vigorously in the wagon, one sitting on my Fah-Fah, its lemony-yellow corners fluttering in the wind we were making for it. I was at the rear pushing with everything my six-year-old arms and back and chubby legs could give. I think my older sister was pulling. But too suddenly our race or whatever we were driving that Radio Flyer so fast for seemed childish, the way most games do when someone gets hurt. Fah-Fah was stuck in the wheel and wrapping tighter and tighter around and around before I screamed, “Stop!” The awful sound I had heard only moments after I could have stopped it was the sound of a five-inch rip being torn in the corner of my blanket. It sounded over the whoops and hollers of my playmates. It struck me right in my 6-year-old heart. I shoved the wagon on its side. Looking back, I’m hoping I didn’t tip the wagon over while my friends were still inside it. I pumped my legs as hard as they would go toward my house, Fah-Fah under my arm. I am sure there must’ve been a distinct smell of fresh-cut grass, so green in my memory. Inside the house I remember my mother sitting poised on the edge of the couch with a needle (already threaded, of course) in one hand and the other extended for quick deposit of the injured patient. But I know that’s not really where she was. She was probably on an important phone call or baking something sweet or, knowing my parents, she was making out with my dad somewhere. But eventually she was sewing. Her bony, pale hands with the translucent and soft skin revealed every vein in her hands. Watching her hand move with the needle I probably could have learned how each bone moves almost freely to get one job done. But I only cried. My barely-older sister, her round cheeks pink with excitement, stuck her blond head in the front door while my mother was still operating and asked, “Awe you coming back to owah game?” Of course I wasn’t. “No,” I had whined through tears. No I wasn’t. Inspecting the stitch now, 15 years after, I want to call my mother up and tell her what a good job she did. The top stitch closes the gaping hole without much noticeable stitching, and on the back is where she gathered the ripped material and used her sewing machine to do a tight stitch. She did this so that the front wouldn’t look torn—so that I wouldn’t notice it without careful inspection. I’m not going to call her. Because despite her best efforts it is the one spot I think of when I hold it in my arms like a broken and brittle antique. But I'm glad.

I have to talk about blessings

2010-12-14T21:38:00.000-08:00

Lately I have had ear aches and ear itches. This morning I actually woke myself up because I was itching my ear in my sleep. I was putting off going to the doctor because of finals and yesterday I hosted my work Christmas party. So this morning I went to the walk-in clinic at Walmart. Here are all the ways I pre-judged it.
~It's going to be full of dirty, sick people.
~The people who work there are going to be rude from having to deal with the sick people.
~It's going to be dirty.
~The doctor really isn't going to care about me.

This is how the visit went. First I got online to look up what these clinics were all about. And apparently Wuestoff Hospital (our county's main hospital chain) is putting them in all the walmart storefronts as a way for people (even with insurace) to be able to get a quick doctor's appointment even on weekends and evenings. It's not a state-run health clinic. It's a doctors office in walmart. And it was brand new!

When I got there I filled out the patient forms and handed them in and was followed by a woman who was there to get sea-sick patches for a cruise she was taking. We chatted while the very nice desk lady checked us both in, and within 15 minutes I went back and met the nurse practitioner. She looked in my ears, nose and mouth and felt my glands and asked me lots of questions. (I have a sinus infection)Then when she realized I didn't have insurance she gave me coupons for my nasal spray and ammoxacilin because it's free to fill! All for $49. (I called an E.N.T. and they said just for a first-visit consultation it would be $306)

I always thought having no insurance would be a major burden. That I would be unhappy with my clinic visits and go un-cared for by busy, underpaid care-givers. But these people were really helpful and caring. And it was so affordable. Other than the fact that in an emergency we would be screwed over by a high ER bill, having no insurance has not turned out to be a burden at all. In fact, I pay less for birth control than I ever did before. It's free, too!

All this to say, God is truly blessing us and today I felt very thankful for all the ways that He shows me He is watching out for me. He wants me to be healed and he wants Kyle not to be stressed about doctor bills. I will always be "the sickly wife" to Kyle, but with this cute little clinic, I won't cost much!

Instead of working on my finals, I'm doing this!

2010-12-01T16:15:00.000-08:00

Here are my Christmas decorations. I came home tonight with every intention of doing some homework seeing as how classes end next week.

Nope. Santa can't wait that long.

Here are the Christmas village places that mom bought me. We have matching sets. From the left there is the Toy Shoppe, The (Southern Baptist) Church, The Court House, and a Blue House that belongs to the Judge/Pastor/ToyMaker of the town. His name is Santa.

Here are the twinkle lights around our massive window

Here is Thornton Santa. Mom bought him for us on Black Friday and said that he would be the santa that our kids will be excited about getting out each year. He's awesome. I don't think the kids will be as excited for Thornton Santa as we were for Sprite Santa.

And here's Sprite Santa in case you didn't know...

Here are our advent stockings. Kyle demands individually-wrapped twizzlers in his stockings so the search is on. *sigh*

Here is Marsh Santa. We had one like this when we were little and it disappeared so Grandma CC gave me hers. I love him the best.

Here is our nativity scene--Peanuts window pasties. I love how Woodstock is baby Jesus. So sweet.

Here are our stockings hung by the front door with care. With hopes that the tacks holding them up with do their job by keeping them there. (the stockings are filled with cotton)

Five-Day Weekend

2010-11-28T18:48:00.000-08:00

From Wednesday until Sunday I had no school and only worked one shift Saturday night. In that time I did the following.

Wednesday I:
Cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. This includes but is not limited to, stripping the bed, cleaning the kitty litter, sweeping and vacuuming the floors, running the dishwasher, Mr. Clean Magic Eraser-ing the doors from Kyle's dirty handprints, scrubbing the tub, its tiles, sink and all house mirrors, and scrubbing the floors on my hands and knees using a pot of almost boiling water, pledge floor cleaner and a green scrubby.

Bathed the cat.

Did a minimal amount of homework because I got all of my major projects done last weekend so I could enjoy the holiday.

Got my hair cut again.

Baked 2 pinapple casseroles in preperations for my two Thanksgiving dinners (neither of which were eaten).

Made a brownie trifle (almost all of which got eaten).

Went to dinner with Kyle.

Saw a movie for free that sucked (Faster, some action film that Kyle's workout buddy invited us to).

Thursday I:

Went to Kyle's parents in Orlando at 9 to watch the parade.

Watched the whole parade with his sisters which was so much fun.

Helped in the kitchen, made the drop biscuits.

Ate at 1:00, left 30 minutes after and were slightly late for mom and dad's dinner, but still caught the tail end.

Played scategories with mom, grandma and neighbor glenna.

Cut coupons and planned black Friday.

Took picture for Christmas card.

Friday I:
Woke up at 2:30 to be at mom's by three. AM.

Shopped until 5 pm at Kohls, then Target, then a huge/awesome mall I'd never been to.

Ate Chik-fil-A, Subway, and Mexican as my 3 meals that day.

Learned how to Crochet while watching Garfield Christmas and The Grinch with mom and dad.

Discovered that the engine light had been on in my car because I had somehow driven off without my gas cap.

Got my windsheilf wipers replaced.

(I have to pause and say that I can't believe that after shopping for 14 hours and learning to crochet, I still was forced to go to Auto Zone and get diagnostics run on my car, buy a new gas cap and get my wipers replaced. I'm lucky my husband cares so much about my car's safety.)

Was asleep by 10

Saturday I:

Went to the flea market with Kyle.

Went to lunch at our favorite pizza place that reminds me of the place we went to in England as kids. (They use those dimply red plastic coke cups and have old arcade games in the back)

Saw a movie not that was good (Love and Other Drugs)

Went to work.

Went grocery shopping.

Sunday I:

Was late to church.

Did laundry while eating leftovers at mom and dad's.

Got a fourth row done on my scarf that I am crocheting.

Went out to eat with Kyle for the third time in one weekend (but all totalled it was technically my 6th time that weekend)--it was a new Mexican place and it was the best I have had since moving here.

Did homework.

Packed Kyle's lunch.

Went to bed.

This is what I have to say about weekends like this. They are wonderful. I did very little critical thinking--except when I was dominating scategories--and I was so tired every night that I was doing that weird laugh thing when your so tired you can't even groan and it comes out in bursts, like sleepy cackling. ?? The issue is that when you go back to the real world, you are so over all the writing and thinking you did the week before the holiday and you're so relaxed from the no-work holiday that you just want to take a nap every time you open the computer.

But here is a really funny knock knock joke I heard at work tonight and was hoping to use on Kyle when I got home but he is asleep. Alas, you will have to try it. Say the whole thing aloud:

me: Knock Knock
you: Who's there?
me: smell mupp
you: smell mupp who?

CRACK UP LAUGHING!

Please excuse this--I worked late tonight.

Enjoy

2010-11-08T22:36:00.000-08:00

I don't have to ask you to enjoy this. You just will.

Like a Baby

2010-10-25T19:53:00.000-07:00

This Sunday I got out the Christmas 1989 home movie. It is slightly less popular than the Christmas 1990 video because there is less fighting and more sweetness. But I enjoyed it just the same. One of my favorite moments was when Dad put the camera on the tripod to film he and mom opening gifts with Holly and Leah running back and forth bringing them their wrapped treasures--Holly mis-reading the labels, giving them to the wrong parent, and Leah correcting her. I mostly sat there and put things in my mouth. (The ten-month-old me, not the 21 year old me) But there was a moment where dad picked me up and kissed me and sat me on his knee. It made me miss being little. It made me miss being surrounded by my big sisters, mom's big hair and dad's mustache. It made me cry.

I saw lots of Steven in Leah, sliding on her belly across the kitchen floor and sticking her tongue out at the camera every chance she got. And it made me think, maybe it's not just boys who are obnoxious at that age. I saw Nolan's serious face in Holly when mom had to tear her from her nap for her own party. Kyle asked mom why she had me drinking formula at only 10 months and she said, "Cara just didn't want to nurse after 8 months. She had to be with her sisters." I still see that in me. I used to think it was cool to live in Florida--until it wasn't. Now I just feel shut out. And the more I watched that video the more I looked forward to Christmas, and not Christmas 2010 in particular. Maybe Christmas 2018--when we have a little baby (who I hope is as chubby and red-headed as I was) and a family of our own. I want so much out of life and the more I live the more I learn that God wants me to want it. He gave me life to live it and I feel every day that I am living closer to my dream.

Friday night Kyle and I were talking about how much we love being married and he said, "In just a few more years I will be exactly where I've always wanted to be." And to that I replied, "This is all I ever wanted so I'm doing pretty good." But the things I want develop. I used to want a husband, now I want a real job and then a baby. (or 2 or 3) I don't call this being unsatisfied. If all I ever wanted was a husband and after that I let things come and go as they pleased, that would be called being complacent.

The more I desire what God wants for me, the more joy I find in life. I hope the same for anyone reading this.

Video of Apartment

2010-10-18T19:05:00.000-07:00

Remeber when you saw our apartment for the first time on THIS post back in February? Well, here is the new and imporved Thornton household. So have at it!

Complete with a blooper reel!
Your viewing pleasure would be much-improved if you had smell-a-vision. Because it smells very homey up in here.

A Moment

2010-10-10T21:24:00.000-07:00

Saturday morning we slept in until ten. I made pancakes, sausage, eggs and cinnamon rolls and we watched a move, 8 seconds. (It's the true story of the champion bull rider of the world.) It was so nice to sit with Kyle and enjoy time not thinking about school, talking about money or worrying about the future. These moments are rare around here.

I know I am still learning to be a wife and I was reminded this weekend.

Kyle is a perfectionist and is super hard on himself when he doesn't get a concept right away or get the grade he wants. And I hate, hate, detest to see him down on himself because I know I am the same way with my own school-or I used to be.
Since we've been married, I am still the same student. I work hard, expect perfection from myself and hate criticism. But since being married, God has changed me into something better. I don't stress out about grades and beat myself up over every sore and score.
And I know that's because I am meant to support Kyle throught these times. I am so thankful for the strength to encourage him but I wish I had a little bit more. When he sighs and looks dejected and disappointed, I get so upset because I don't know how to react. I want to convince him that he is perfect but he doesn't believe me. It takes so much out of the both of us when he has a hard time on an assignment. I try to convince him that it's a small step in the big picture, but I could tell myself the same thing about this struggle.

All this to say, I cherish the moments of peace in our lives and thank God for the strength to get through the rough times. And I also thank God that this semester is flying by. My perfect husband needs a break.

This is Kyle and I out to his first lobster dinner with his dad and Mary. Just thought a blog is more fun with a picture.

Top Ten Tuesday

2010-09-17T22:45:00.000-07:00

I haven't done one of these in a while because I have been running out of things by about 5 and by ten I am grasping at straws. But this one came pretty easily seeing as how my mind has been in a foggy fog for the past few weeks.

So here they are--The Top Ten Things I (ooh la la!) do on Autopilot.

1. Turn left out of my apartment whether or not I truly and desperately need to be turning right.

2. Type in google.com at the top of my browser before ever realizing that I do not need to google anything at the moment.

3. Put the toilet seat down. Since my cat has taken to drinking toilet water (which is blue and full of disinfecting chemicals) I have gained an excellent habit...and excellent confindence in his immune system. Because he is not even close to being dead.

4. Condition my hair. I can always remember if I have washed my hair. But every night for the past week I have had an inner dialogue with myself upon wondering whether or not I have conditioned.
"Did I condition yet?"
"No, you didn't."
"Yes I did. Remember it came out in a long snake and I swirled it up like whipped cream in my palm?"
"Oh, yes that was fun. You definately conditioned."

5. Dial Kyle's phone every.single.solitary. time that I attempt to place a call.

6. Give my customers the rundown of our new items. The other day, I listed our new items so fast and with such precise emphasis that they both stared at me and the wife said to her husband without blinking, "She's like a robot." Darn.

7. Say, "Have a good night" no matter what time of day it is.

8. Go straight to my old room when I walk into mom and dad's house. Once I get there I always just stand there wondering what I'm doing. But Sunday I decided I would leave my shoes there so I wouldn't feel so dumb.

9. Sing. This is more of activity I do while on autopilot. I just always hum or sing while at work to the point where I don't realize I'm doing it unless someone acknowledges it.

10. Correct grammar. I edit Kyle's papers every Monday and have become quite efficient and can do it while watching The Office. (The Office Starts This Week)

Ghost Clocks

2010-09-02T20:13:00.001-07:00

In the happy Marsh home there was always one clock on the living room wall that chimed every hour. It was subdued, soft and sweet enough to go unnoticed most of the time by the happy family. And it never interrupted their thoughts or caused them discomfort. It belonged.

Then Grandpa made another chiming clock for the house which already had its own clock. The living room clock did not understand why it was being replaced by this new clock that stood on its own two legs and had shelves for little statues and glass figurines. "You're not being replaced, chimed the new clock. But soon you'll be forgotten." It's chime was sweet and unsettling. But the living room clock did not respond, for it was getting close to the hour. It's chime was strong and humble. But the new clock yet persisted. "You chime every hour. And so do I. But can you chime on the half-hour? On the quarter-hour? I can. And I will."

And so it did. But the living room clock was not soon forgotten. The family still remembered to change its batteries and set it at daylight savings times. It still belonged. Meanwhile, Grandpa donated yet another clock to the house that already had two clocks. This one sat on its own like the new clock, which was now the not-so-new clock. But this new clock was short, and was what is called a mantle clock. It sat on the mantle where it belonged. But there was a problem with this mantle. This mantle was located in the living room, the same room from which the living room clock hung--the same room from which the living room clock chimed its chimes. "This will not do," said the living room clock--the real living room clock that is.

But before the real living room clock could hatch a plan to get rid of the clock that sat on the mantle that happened to be in the living room, something was discovered about the clock on the mantle. When the living room clock and the not-so-new clock that chimed on every quarter-hour, half-hour and hour were chiming on the hour, the mantle clock was not chiming. And when the living room clock and the not-so-new clock were not chiming, the mantle clock was chiming. It chimed loud and was very proud to also chime every quarter and half hour. "It is your kind of clock," said the living room clock to the not-so-new clock. "Tell it when to chime." But the not-so-new clock refused. "I cannot help that one. It is so old, that it must be wound in the back and there is no one to wind it."

But the living room clock knew that all was not lost. The young girl of the house was always very unsettled by the chiming of the not-so-new clock. So the living room clock waited patiently for the young girl to grow weary of the loud mantle clock on its irregular schedule. And she did. She tried moving it to the counter. "But I am a mantle clock," it would say. "A counter-clock is a direction or movement, not a proper name for a clock of my stature." So, the proud clock was moved back to his mantle. The living room clock grew restless but the young girl did not disappoint. She found a way to stop the mantle clock's chiming once and for all. For by tipping the clock forward and placing under it a stack of tissue, half a deck of playing cards, or a packet of post-it notes, the pendulum would fall forward, thus disabling the mantle clock from chiming loudly and obnoxiously and all times of day and night.

The living room clock was satisfied. "You were always my favorite clock," said the girl to the living room clock at 2:15 one afternoon. Just then, the not-so-new clock chimed in. After all, it was the quarter of the hour. "And you," said the young girl, holding up a stack of post-it notes to the not-so-new clock, "you're next."

This story is purely fictional. Any resemblance of names, faces, pendulums or living rooms living or dead is purely coincidental. By Cara Thornton.

Author's note: I was inspired to write this story by the chimes I think I can still hear when my apartment is quiet. These are the Ghost Clocks. They make me miss that living room clock, and only that living room clock.

Quick Question

2010-08-30T15:50:00.001-07:00

Since I began writing seriously, I have had a fear of fiction. I don't trust myself to make up a story, tell someone's life or perhaps end someone's life and not somehow screw it up. But this fall I am taking a fiction-writing workshop--a requirement for graduation. And tonight I am starting on my main character and the two supporting ones. One of the interesting "rules" that my professor gave is to love your character, but not to cuddle him. At first I had been thinking, 'I'll just write someone like me and it will be easy to understand them.' But that's not brave. This is college--the only time where I will be able to challenge myself and no one can tell me I'm wrong. So then I thought, I'll write about a terrible person who deserves nothing. But my professor reminded me that it will be impossible to write about someone who I don't like. If I try that, I will only end up driving this character further and further into the ground before killing them or giving them a terribly disfiguring disease.

Gosh.
Writing is powerful stuff.

So here is my quick question.
As a Christian, I have a witness. But in my writing, I want to create a character who isn't me. Maybe he's a mercenary or maybe she is an illegal alien trying to make it by any means necessary. She's not me. So should I still not use cuss words, even when I am trying to create a real character? If writing is so powerful, what is powerful about not making your ex-marine character who took shrapnel in Vietnam talk like a softy when some liberal gets him all riled up? Would he say something like, 'gosh darn it you big jerk!'? Probably not.
It's not me saying it...but then again it is--in the end, anyway.

Food for thought. Chew away!

What Are We?

2010-08-18T08:28:00.001-07:00

I didn't have any scripture read at my wedding, but if I had, it would have been this verse from Genesis. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."

When my dad read this verse at my sister's wedding, his version used the words "cling to his wife," and I think those words are more apporpriate for the way I am feelig today.

When we're single, we are self-sufficient. We have friends, family and maybe a boyfriend around. But there is something about marriage that is an earnest need for one single person. That's what has caused these words "cling to" to pop up in my head.

It's funny how people coming into our lives can both add to who we are as people when they're with us, make us feel less-human when they're gone. Suddenly we can't sleep unless he's next to us. Everything we do seems a bit more dull unless we can get his opinion or reaction. How did we get here? What are we without our husbands?

Put your torches away, feminists. I'm not saying we are helpless or hopeless without our husbands--maybe just, less. In marriage we can finally admit to one person--I may have lived before I met you, but it's nothing worth talking about.

Sometimes when Kyle tries to correct me on things like working out or eating healthfully, I jokingly say, "I survived quite well for 20 years before I knew you existed so don't try to change me now." There are still some things that haven't changed.

And if I have learned anything in my years of writing, it is to never apologize for something you write. But I just hope I am not coming across like one of those women who would disintegrate without a man in her life. God made me strong but he also made me to love one man forever.

And I will tell you exactly what I told my best friend when I was a theatirical and expressive 14 year-old--"I think I was just made to be in love."

Thick Skins

2010-08-08T15:52:00.000-07:00

As a girl who grew up having a stay-at-home mother always cooking or cleaning something, there is a lot of pressure on me as a new wife to know what to do with things like beef bullion and chicken carcasses. I am supposed to know if .88 cents per pound is good for grapes and how long birthday cake will stay fresh in the fridge. But, alas, I hardly knew much about any of these things when I returned from my honeymoon. I half expected mom to slip a manual to me as I left the wedding reception or at least to find it on my doorstep when I got home. (Maybe my next-door pot-head, I mean neighbor took it).

But I am learning that it's all about time. It's not like mom had anyone to teach her these things--that I know of. So it just took her a few years to learn about prices and the like. So the point of all of this introduction is to say, I learned something. When we returned from our honeymoon my caring sister, Leah had bought us plenty of groceries to last us a while and included in her grocery list was a 5-lb. bag of potatoes. Now, these scared me, quite honestly. The only thing I know how to make from a raw potatoe is mashed. But I already have instant mashed potatoes in the fridge. So for the past (counting in my head...) 9 weeks these potatoes have layed dormant in the crisper where she put them. I was imagining they had grown moldy and soft in strange places so I was not only put off by the pressure but by the regret of having not performed any starchy miracle with them.

But it's Sunday and every good Marsh girl knows that there's one thing that happens on Sunday, and one thing that doesn't. The thing that does--nap. The thing that doesn't--dinner. This second half of the concept I have yet to explain to Kyle, so he somehow forces me to make dinner every Sunday. But since the beginning of Marshdom, no Marsh man or woman has eaten a real dinner on a Sunday. It's always cereal or the ever-famous wings and fries. (A variation of which I was hoping to replicate tonight). But darn, there were no french fries in the freezer. So I took out the potatoes and inspected them thorougly. No smell, no mushy parts or mold. Wow! These potatoes waited for me! After thanking each one individually I looked up a homefries recipe online and found that they're made the same way I make frozen homefies. Fry 'em up! So as they sizzle in the pan, the chicken fingers bake in the oven, and Kyle finishes our Sunday nap, I am proud to stand in my kitchen blogging about this small triumph.

And oh yeah, in case you are confused like I was, I happen to know that .88 cents/lb for grapes is an excellent price and you should take advantage.

Dreams Change

2010-08-04T20:09:00.000-07:00

Do you ever find that you do most of your retrospective thinking at a certain time? Mine is when it's raining and I'm watching the night fly by out the car window. Okay, this could have been a one-time dramatic moment but I must confide in you, dear reader that in retrospect of my retrospection I was feeling quite deep.

I started thinking about the things that I want. Selfishly I pushed past the years that are soon to come of job-hunting, degree-chasing and marriage-making and started to think about what will really matter to me in, let's say five or ten years.

But before I divulge my five to ten year dreams, it would be best to explain why they are worth writing about.

As a child I thought everything about my life could be a movie. When my mother would turn of my favorite '90s show (there were so many) when it was only half-way through and tell me to clean up the giant dog droppings in our back yard, I would lean my head against the cement wall of our carport--in one hand the little blue shovel and in the other a crap-encrusted milk gallon cut in half--and I would imagine being an orphan forced to do labor and to have only buttered bread and water to look forward to for dinner. (for some reason that was the worst thing I could come up with) I wanted to act and sing and star in feature films that would obviously revolve around me and my dramatic life. I wanted to marry someone famous and hire someone else to clean up my dog's droppings. I can't remember the day I lost those dreams. But one by one I laughed them off.

So when things seem tough I tell myself to think about what will matter in five or ten years. In five years, I'll be wanting a baby, to plan our dream home with lots of land, family that live no further than a day's drive, a job where I can write or read or do whatever it is God wants me to do with all these words in my head, with all these dreams and facts and everything I've learned. I thank God that one day I can pour my life into my children, and not into myself. I'll show them why Yogi Bear and Bugs Bunny are hands-down the best cartoons to walk the television screen, why peanut butter makes absolutely anything edible and why even if they want to pretend to be abandoned orphans with no food to live on, they will still have to pick up after that dog they begged for.

I will play the guitar for them and hope they're more like Kyle than like me--workers with patience who like to go to bed early. And I'll try to always understand them. But if they choose to be litte drama-machines with a daydream fantasy always up their sleeve, chocolate perpetually on their face and fingers and a temper set off by as little as a breeze, then I will understand them all the more, because they'll be just like me.

Survive

2010-07-28T18:51:00.001-07:00

I have no central theme to this blog. Which is why I'll never make it as a blogger extrodinare.

~When mom and dad got stuck in Houston on their way back from Abilene, they had to stay in a hotel and this is mom's recount of the experience. "We had to sleep in a hotel and dad had to scrounge for food at Jack in the Box."
Our reply? Sounds like a vacation to me! Hotel room with real AC and those cute little soaps and JOTB for dinner? In Texas? I'm there!
We seriously went home and were like, "One day we'll be able to do something like that."

But alas, they were less thrilled about the idea.

Kyle once said to me, "Do you know why I whistle all the time rather than sing? I've never told anyone this. It's because I don't know the words." Pretty innocent, and I already knew he couldn't remember many lyrics so it came as no surprise. What did surprise me however, is that THIS song came on the radio the other day and Kyle new EVERY.SINGLE.WORD. Not so surprising considering the subject matter, but still. Every word. And he sang them with conviction. Typical of my husband.

My car was picked up from the shop today but we were told that it needs a new timing belt which is going to be between 400-700 dollars. There goes my possible Texas trip this summer. Stupid German engineering. Das Auto my behind!

I'm a Fan?

2010-07-24T07:28:00.000-07:00

This goes out to all the wives who've ever asked, "What color are we rooting for, honey?" This is for all the girls who've said, "Hey Dad, which team do you want to win?" and been completely perplexed by his answer--"I'm not really a fan of either team." What do you mean, "not really a fan"? And why even watch if not?

This is for any man, woman or child who has ever asked--what does it mean to be a fan?

Yesterday I was driving down a tight city street and the Mercedes in front of me had a silver Longhorn decal on his bumper. Not only did it strike me as a classy way to express one's fan-ism. (I find the flags and bumper stickers a bit gauche) but it got me thinking, why do I get excited when I see...ya know...

Am I a Longhorns fan,or do I only like them because they're from Texas? I mean, in any given game between the Longhorns and--anyone, I would root for the Longhorns. But I don't know who any of their players are. Same goes for Dallas.

The other day I waited on a guy with a tatooo of the state of Texas on his arm and I said, nice tattoo. Then he took off his Dallas hat and asked if I liked his hat as well and of course I said, "Oh yeah! My husband's a big fan! We love them." But why did I say that? I don't like to watch sports on television. And I spent much of my teenage years denying that fact because I thought guys would think it was attractive that I would watch sports with them. However, I can say now with a sudden rush of clarity that I never really watch sports--even if I'm looking at a television screen where sports are being played. I look at the players, the fans, the ground--but I can safely say that nothing about the way they are moving a ball interests me.

So you may be thinking, "No, cara. Give it up. You're not a fan."

But wait one minute there. If the Longhorns lost to the Gators, I would not be happy. But then if the Gators lost to the Seminoles I would not be happy either because I think FSU has a boring logo. See! There are no sports in my head when I think about football or basketball or anything else. There are only colors and players.

Take the Yankees. Of course I'm a Yankees fan--born and raised. And I will admit that if you take me out to the ballgame I will watch in rapture for at least 10-15 minute intervals. I like the Yankees because my dad likes them. So I want no other team to win, even in a game between the A's and the Braves. But I digress.

I feel like a fan because I like the team. Can it be left at that? Do I have to watch the games and keep the stats and wear the colors? (Well I do have a Longhorns tank top that I bought at HEB in San Antonio) Once I wore it to school and a girl had the nerve to ask me if I worked at the popular food chain, Longhorn. "No! This is my team! Longhorn has no S and no football. It's just a restaurant!" Okay, I didn't shout at her but, come on. I'm a fan no doubt about it.

Things You Should Know

2010-07-14T20:43:00.000-07:00

For the past 3 weeks I have been working every day but Sunday. It really takes a toll on your people skills when you're in the same place 6 days a week and it gets you thinking about things you wish you could tell your customers. I know a few (okay, most) of these things will seem nit-picky, but what else do I have to do 6 days a week if not nit-pick. I cetainly refuse to enjoy myself. Ha, just kidding. But here we go.

Don't grab the plate out of my hand unless you can see that I am handing it to you because I can't reach you. So rude. I am presenting you with your meal, not passing out an exam. It's not a race to see who can get started first.

Don't let your kid draw on the table with crayons. Realize that the next person who sits down will ask me to come over and clean the table twice before they finally believe me that it is crayon and it will not come off without chemicals.

Please don't repeat someone's order as if I didn't hear them. I heard them, let them do the talking. Yesterday I waited on a grandmother and a grandson who must have been 17. He said, "I'll have the frisco melt with fries." Grandma says, "He'll have the frisco melt with fries." Yeah, I got that.

Please don't try and be my buddy by saying, "Oh how rude of that lady to tip you in change," then leave me two bucks. That old lady tipped me in change but it added up to $4.48. More than you were willing to give.

If you're over the age of 11, we hate singing happy birthday to you more than you hate being sung to. Trust us.

Please don't make me wait to get your order because you're "busy" putting your child's cardboard cars together. Cardboard isn't worth waiting for. Oh and your kid will NEVER remember to take that stupid car home and I will end up having to clean it up along with the stickers they decided would look better on the table than on the car.

Please don't ask to be put far away from the air conditioning vent. As if there isn't one pointed in every direction no matter where you sit. As if the building isn't cooled evenly. I am going to seat you here and tell you it's the warmest spot in the restuarant. And you'll believe me. Bring a sweater.

Please don't complain about your food if you refuse to let me fix it. I know you just want to make me feel bad. Don't pretend you really "just wanted to let me know." If you don't want a new meal or a free dessert out of the deal, don't say anything. "Hon, I asked for no cheese on my burger." "Oh, I'm sorry. I'll get a new one right our for you." "No. It's fine. I just wanted you to know."

Finally. Do not tell me I was an excellent server and that it was a pleasure meating me I look just like you granddaughter and have a great smile and make that bowtie look good and have a graceful presence...then leave a bad tip. It's sad, but servers all have one thing in common. If you're not going to tip, hold the small talk. We're here to make money.

**There are exceptions to most of these rules but it's more fun to just say the rules and make you wonder if you've every done any of these things. I know none of you have done the last one. It is far to shameful and is usually saved for old men and teenagers.

My Neicephews

2010-07-12T12:20:00.001-07:00

Saturday morning Kyle and I walked over to Steve's Diner across the street for breakfast. We got to talking about how Gabby and Steven might be doing while missing their daddy. That lead to our whole breakfast conversation being about the kids--my neicephews. (neice + nephews) I brought up the time that I came to visit Leah and she had promised to take Steven bowling, but the bowling alley had been closed, or my flight had come in early so they couldn't go. So that whole day he had been wearing his bowling shirt and was so excited and kept asking when we were going bowling and pointing to the little ball and pin on his shirt and he was just so cute and concerned about bowling. It made me miss all the kids so much that Kyle asked me if I was about to cry. I guess my eyes were burning a little. But I didn't cry and we ate and had a good talk but then I found out that mom and dad were going to visit and it made me so sad. I know I just saw the whole family and it was awesome but it really wasn't the same and I wasn't sure exactly why. Then I realized it's always been just me when I visit my sisters. When Nolan was 6 weeks and I went to visit, I hardly put him down except when he ate and it was the same way when Jack was 6 weeks and I went to visit. There were so many people in the house around the wedding time and I still feel like I regret being so frazzled that weekend because I didn't get to give them baths or play with Gab's hair or take goofy pictures and do all of the things I usually get to do. I love different things about each one of them and I miss my family so much. I'm so thankful, even when I'm sad. I would rather be sad with my heart full than be happy and have nothing to love and look forward to.

Do you know what this class is about?

2010-06-30T18:39:00.001-07:00

Summer classes started on Monday. A year ago this week I walked into a classroom and sat behind Kyle and we checked each other out but wouldn't speak until the last day of class. Anywho--I'm taking Spanish at BCC and an online class through UCF. The online hell--oh, gosh I meant to say class-- is called Theory and Tech of Literary Criticism. What does that mean to you? I asked mom and she said, "Learning the theory of literary critics? Am I right?" To which I replied, "How should I know? I was asking you!" So I must go off of the assignments we are given. So far I have read 20 pages by Plato on why art is just imitation. What I took away from it was a horse knows all about a bit, because it's in his mouth. The maker of the bit only knows how to make it, and the artists who paint horses with bits in their mouths are the furthest from the real knowledge--which is embodied in the horse. Get it? Here's another way Plato said it. A flute player knows how the flute is supposed to feel on his lips, and if it's all wrong, he'll tell the flute maker to do this or that to make it better. The artist painting a picture of the flute player is an IMIATATOR of true knowledge, because he doesn't know how to make a flute and he definately doesn't know how to play one. Today from Artistotle I learned that the best way to make a tragedy is to have pitiable situation happen to people who are half way between good and bad and have terrible things happen to them that are in no way their fault. Wow, Stot--that sounds truly tragic. So what I'm saying is I have no idea what this class is really about. My favorite part of the class so far is the guy who sent a mass email to everyone in the class. "Can anyone help me? Tell me where to get the text book? What are the subjects of our assignments? What is this class about? Help." I feel you, man. I almost wrote back to him but I thought, odds are this whole class is like the blind leading the blind. I cannot believe I have written 9 pages on Aristotle and still had the energy to blab incessently in my lame attempt to let you know how I feel. Moment of reflection over--to bed to think myself to sleep.

My Husband is Funny

2010-06-29T12:38:00.000-07:00

My husband. He has always been pretty funny and cute. But lately, I am pretty surprised by the funny things he says and does. One day I asked what had gotten into him. "Why are you doing this goofy voice? I have never heard you be so silly before!" I was surprised by his reply. "I guess now that we're married I just know you're not going to judge me anymore so I can be myself." Well if this is yourself then that's okay with me. So yesterday morning, Kyle, my earlybird hubby, woke up at 5:30 for work and I peered out from under the covers to see what he was doing. He was using his cell phone as a flashlight (a poor one at that) to find his work clothes in the closet. So I sat up and told him he could turn the light on, I wasn't sleeping anymore. But he just kept looking with the tiny little cell phone light. So I turned on our bedside lamp and the room lit up, letting me see little Stoney helping Kyle look for his clothes, and I saw Kyle freeze up and grab Stoney. "Quick, we've been discovered! Take cover!" He yelled and ran into the bathroom. I laughed so hard! Kyle is also known for being a little clumsy sometimes, like any of us. But the other night we were walking out of our movie theater and the long dark channel leading to the hallway, you know, movie theaters always have carpeted walls once you get into the screening room. So Kyle was walking very fast and nerdy to make me laugh and hit his shoulder really hard against the carpet wall. Instead of just laughing at himself, he bustted his chest up against the wall and pushed against it like it was a person and he yelled, "You got beef? You wanna go?" I ran up to him and grabbed his arm laughing but he was still in character. He shook me off and said "Jerk, did you see that guy back there? I should've knocked him out." I think I laughed more in the parking lot than in the whole movie. I love my funny husband.

Shallow thoughts

2010-06-24T11:55:00.001-07:00

A blog is a great place to get out your deepest thoughts and get feedback. It's also a good place to share those surface-floating thoughts that you can't help but get out because you want to know if anyone else has ever thought the same thing.

Have you ever wondered what your cashier is typing away on her keyboard for when all you bought was a little something not worth much? You never wanted to lean over the counter and crane your neck to see why the heck it takes so much finger action to ring something up?

I went to Things Remembered yesterday to order an engraving on a necklace to thank Dominique, my made of honor for everything. She bought us dinner gift cards, zoo passes with special treats like Giraffe encounters and kayak adventures included (which we're using tomorrow) and she even bought us gift cards to Disney World! So I wrote down what I want the engraving to say, then I went to cash out at the register.

And have you ever seen that episode of the Simpsons where Bart calls Australia or somewhere and he is dialing the same number for about 3 minutes and eventually you can't help but laugh, like, "Are you kidding?" I wish someone had been with me to laugh.

The cashier just kept hitting the down arrow then enter. Down, enter enter enter, down down down down down, enter enter, backspace, down down down down. For like 5 minutes.

So then today I went to CVS and was astounded after all I bought were some digital prints and I was handed this reciept.

Okay, I admit. I also bought some silly bands. If you don't know what silly bands are, they seem to be a craze sweeping tweens and restuarant workers. Everyone at my work shares them and I had none! So I found these knock-off brands called Shaped Rubber Bands, but they're cowboy shaped so how could I resist?

Didn't mean to start by posing a question and end with silly bands but, I admitted this was a not-so-thought-provoking post.

Not Quite

2010-06-21T07:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was like any other special Sunday. We sat in the same row in the same order as always. Dad, Mom, Kyle, Me, Mom's friend. Then we went to mom and dad's to get all the food to take to Grandma's for the Father's Day celebration. Ah, but first Dad and I started work on a project we have been planning for years. It's called The Many Do's of Sue and will pretty much be a walk through the years of Mom's hair. We made a file appropriatey called Sue's Do's and put every hair do available on mom and dad's computer in it. Then we all watched it as a slide show. It was most fun to hear Kyle's reaction to some, especially the one I call the Jim Carey.

He would say things under his breath like, "oh.no." But it was fun and dad said that the real work will begin with scanning pictures from old albums. Then we went to grandma's where uncle Jeff was an hour late and uncle Don came a half hour after that. But we enjoyed talking and all the dad's thanked their families and Kyle thanked me for not letting him be a dad yet. So I slowly rose from my chair and said, "On that note, we have an announcement." To which everyone laughed (and then I realized what a mistake that had been because all night I dreamt that I was going into labor.) So when we finally ate it was time to leave for dad's gift from Kyle and I. We took him and mom to see Toy Story 3! It was hilarious and so much fun! Dad loved it, as we knew he would. Then Kyle and I went grocery shopping and I wasn't sure how he would do because he was tired but it was so much fun. He always reads the small price labels to see how much they are charging per ounce depending on the packaging. For instance it was much smarter to buy raisins by the jar than by the little boxes. He's so cute about groceries. What a nice father's day.

Stoney

2010-06-16T17:07:00.001-07:00

Stoney is our 8 week old kitten and he is learning so much about the things he likes and dislikes.

He likes underwear

He likes to get into strange places

This is after he hopped on the counter as I was scooping myself some delicious brownie trifle and I plopped some on his forhead by accident.

He hasn't quite got the bathing thing down yet. He pretty much cleaned his face for 10 minutes until I helped him out.

He likes silk flowers

Other than that, he likes cheerios in milk, the sound of food in his tin bowl and me--so far.

It's a Tenant Thing

2010-06-16T07:03:00.000-07:00

I have been many things in life. Daughter, sister, friend, dog--yeah. Being a tenant is a new and excrutiating experience. To get something repaired, such as our air conditioning unit which blows out air that is 59 degrees yet only cools our studio apartment to a toasty 85, I have to make a phone call to my landlord whom I have never met. He lives in Miami. He tells me he will call a repairman. The repairman doesn't call him back so my landlord calls me to tell me this. Then finally I get a repairman who tells me 3 things.

1. I have never seen a hotel air conditioning unit stuffed 7 feet up a wall before and used to cool an apartment.
2. I can't do this alone. I'll come back tomorrow,
3. I've never seen anything like this before.

"Yeah, I heard you mention something about that."

I heard a joke recently.

"I live in a studio apartment. It kind of puts me in a weird situation because on any given day I'm only one room away from being homeless."

After Repairman Steve made his exit, I called Miami Landlord to tell him the not-so-newsy news. He told me three things.

1. It's hot out, so the air conditioning is just working hard.
2. That air conditioner is brand new out of the box and has never had any problems.
3. Cold air falls. So...eventually...that cold air up there will fall down.

So I told him 3 things. I quickly got off the phone and told myself I needed to pray from him.

1. It's hot out, so if the ac is working so hard, why is it 85 degrees in here?
2. If the unit is "brand new out of the box" and this apartment has "never been lived in" like you told me, then how could you POSSIBLY know if there had every been any problems with it. (This one I did not say, because I don't like confrontation).
3. "Right, so I just have to sit here and wait for the air to fall. It will fall eventually right? It's just sitting at the ceiliing so I'll just wait a few more days, right?"

I don't like being sarcastic to strangers, so I stopped the nonsense and made chicken salad for dinner.

Sunday

2010-06-14T07:03:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was Sunday--the morning after our first night in our apartment, mom and dad's first day back from Guatemala, and the first time that we would have family over to visit our new home. Mom, Dad and the grandparents brought lunch over after church and Kyle and I presented a honeymoon slide show. Our new kitten, Stoney was dressed to the nines in his new neck

tie and showed off his hunting skills for 4 hours straight while we ate and caught up on the happenings of Guatemala, Grandma's health and the Thorntons being Thorntons. After they left I had one and one-half hour to prepare a meal for Kyle's Dad and step-mom who were coming over for dinner. Stoney crashed on the bed the ENTIRE time they were here, laying on his back, feet in the air while I made Holly's oven-fried chicken, Aunt Karen's mashed potato bake, asparagus and her brownie trifle for dessert. I just love the cookbook she got me. Let's just start with the fact that kitchen was a wreck. Their arrival was posted for 6 pm. At 430 I read directions to my planned meal. The chicken said, marinate in buttermilk for SEVERAL HOURS. HMMM, and hour should do. The trifle said: refridgerate for 8 hours, then serve. HMMMM, I could try to lengthen dinner conversation. But everything went great. I used all of my new serving dishes from B, B and B, the chicken was crispy and delicious and everyone had thirds of the mashed potato bake. Then we played a fun game that his parents brought, I served the trifle, which is huge because I served it in my new punch bowl--but Mary calmed my worries by saying "Don't worry, you've got two fat people here to help you eat it." Plus I packed a bunch in Kyle's lunch for today. Now now today I am off to work out then hit the Social Secutiy office for a little name changing action. I am afraid to make any other plans after that because mom said it will take all day. So I am grabbing a book and debating on taking Stoney with me. He loves car rides, and the bank drive thru. 6t5----And that is what happens when kittens crawl on laptops while I'm on the phone. I also see that he labled this post "qq0oooooooooo."

The Wedding Hair Cut from Down Under

2010-05-25T06:07:00.000-07:00

Last night I gave Kyle his final haircut before the wedding just long enough in advance for it to grow out a little before the big day. Before we began I took extra care cleaning up the kitchen after our first dinner with all of my new kitchen stuff--to gain my composure. On a side note, chicken fried steak, mashed taters and zuchini were on the menu. Note the glass. Yep, 8 of em. With grandma cc, re-gifts are never a negative.

Anywho, before we began, Kyle said. "You mess up on this...and..." I like to think he paused there because he couldn't think of a big enough threat. To which I replied, "No pressure, though. Right?" And despite the fact that half-way through the trim I managed to get more of his ear than hair in my scissors, he admitted that it was the best haircut I'd ever given. Then, as usual, he styled it. But this time he asked me to take a picture.

And I thought, awww he wants to save a photo of his wedding haircut for posterity. But then he turned to the left, right and even made me take a picture of the back of his head. Necessary? I think not.

Then he studied them. And still decided that it was the best haircut ever. And he WAS NOT just saying that because he yelled so loud when I nearly clipped his ear off that I started crying. Definately NOT. hahahahha

The way things are

2010-05-19T20:53:00.000-07:00

The wedding is practically here. And while I am sure that I will pause to reflect once more before the wedding, I would like to do so now as I think about how things have changed for me and for Kyle and I as a couple over the past year. One year ago, I was in a transition of a different sort. I was dreading UCF but very excited to have finished the milestone of BCC by getting my AA. I was also dating and hanging out with all the wrong people. And though I had stopped being friends with all the people I knew were bringing me down, the quest for new and better friends was one mistake after another. Then my two wonderful sisters gave me a bit of advice each that I feel may have helped turn things around. Holly have me Psalm 37:4 when I told her I felt like I was doing everything wrong and getting no closer to what I felt I needed. Delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. The difficult part of that verse is not just saying, "okay, that's how I get what I want," but truly remembering to DELIGHT in the lord, not just do enough to get your way. Then Leah reminded me that there is nothing I can imagine or dream up for myself that is better than what God has for me. And I am a dreamer and a planner by trade, so that was hard to swallow. Ever since I was ten and started watching A Wedding Story on TLC, I have dreamt up my perfect relationship and never managed to create it. But God did. But the real reason I am writing this is because of my dealings with the changes in a relationship.

When dating starts, it's all about eachother. Your thoughts are consumed by him, and his by you. You will do anything to please him, make him laugh, happy, full or whatever. Then when you're engaged, all of that is amplified. I think being engaged has been the happiest time in my life. But once the engagement turns into planning mode, for me anyway, I began to feel pushed out of my own relationship. Suddenly I wasn't the bride, but the planner. Not the love interest of my groom, but the food taster, music picker and whatever else needed done. And not all the time, of course. But enough to make me want this wedding to get planned quick fast and in a hurry. What I'm saying is, tonight my parents' small group prayed for Kyle and I. They made a circle around us and each one that felt close to us prayed for our marriage. And I felt this huge rush come over me as my excitement came back. For a month I've been wearing blinders. Now I just want to breathe and think about marriage, not just the getting married part. You know what I mean? I want to imagine again, and dream things up. Then I will be happy to do what Leah told me, and watch God do it in his own better way. And I will be happy to delight in that plan, like Holly told me, and watch God give me what he knows I desire. I am so excited for my wedding, and the honeymoon, and especially for my family to be here. And this whole planning part has been a lesson in patience and the ability to look past what seems close and to accept what seems too far. If you are reading this, you must really love me. Becuase you just finished a really long reflection by a really over-tired bride-to-be. And if you're reading this, I love you too!

Top Ten Tuesday

2010-05-18T20:12:00.001-07:00

I love my little apartment. But I just realized...You know your apartment is tiny if...

10. You often sit down on the couch and remember that both remotes are in the kitchen, because that is where you watch most of your tv from.

9. Half way through any movie you watch (because if you could afford a bigger apartment you could probably afford cable and not watch movies all the time), your fiance gets up and brings his bed into the living room to lay on it. Then you do the same, because it is so much more comfy that way.

8. At the end of each evening, you can spray one paper towel with fabuloso and wipe from the top left corner of your kitchen to the bottom right hand corner with that same paper towel, then throw it away and have a perfectly spotless kitchen floor in about 15 seconds.

7. While your fiance is in the shower, you can have perfectly normal converstaions about his day while making his dinner.

6. But if you try to run water in the kitchen while he showers, you will get in big trouble.

5. You laugh at yourself when you catch yourself calling the door, "the front door" as if there were a side door, or a back door or any other door other than the bathroom door.

4. You often get into tiffs with your fiance when he refuses to leave the kitchen because until he does that, you can't open the dishwasher or the oven.

3. You can say, "goodnight, I love you, sleep well" to your fiance from the hallway, and he'll say it back. Because he heard you loud and clear.

2. Once, the first and only time you had someone over for dinner, you let her have her own chair at the table, and you ate dinner in your fiance's lap.

1. All of the pictures from your old bedroom fill up all but 2 walls.

Not Me Monday

2010-05-17T08:58:00.000-07:00

I love it when Kyle says I have sick breath. Sick breath makes me feel sexy.

I am not looking forward to my wedding shower next saturday, and I am not scared that no one will show up.

I did not just finish the second season of Army Wives before even leaving my bed this morning.

I did not give my shift away tomorrow because I do not have to try on my wedding dress for the last time. I definatley would have been too busy to go to work, really.

I am not at all excited to the point of no sleep that my family will be here in a week and 2 days. That does not sound too far away and close all at the same time.

I certainly do not need to get all the junk out of my room this week.

The tux shop did not decide to be closed the entire weekend of the wedding and is not making me feel guilty for them having to come in and give my out-of-towners their tuxes the Saturday before the wedding.

Kyle and I did not watch the first 45 minutes of Avatar in black and white this weekend before we guessed that there was something wrong with the tv, because isn't Avatar supposed to be the most visually stimulating movie of our time? Nah, black and white seemed totally normal.

Last night, I did not cry in the cat adoption center of PetCo. I do not think that our landlord can suck it if he thinks we're not gonna get a cat after he gave us an apartment that is a giant debt-hole.

Kyle did not promise to get me a kitty after the honeymoon. I do not think that is too far away.

We've got hobbies!

2010-05-03T09:23:00.000-07:00

Friday night we stayed up until 12 doing homework, then until 2 watching Jungle Book. Will I ever do that again?--stay up late when I know Kyle's an early riser and is going to wake me up at 9 no matter how early we go to bed? Probably. So since we were up so early we went out for bagels and a little trip to the flea market. There we found a used robins-egg blue beach cruiser for $23 being sold by an Asian woman whose pink lace thong came up way higher than her khaki shorts would allow. Kyle talked about it for an hour. We somehow got the bike into Kyle's backseat and spent all day taking parts from a bike we found and replacing, painting, waiting, painting, oiling...and so on. I still need a basket for it, but it's pretty much honeymoon ready. We're gonna buy Kyle one that doesn't need quite so much love. But we're very proud of it. And may I just say, I have yet to hand Kyle a peice of machinery that he doesn't know how to disassemble and reassemble. Have you ever seen the inside of a bicycle? Cool!

Here it is being taken apart already. Very rusty and scratched up. And the spokes were corroded and needed replacing. (i think that's what you call the part that attaches to the pedal).

Being painted. We also painted all of the silver parts with a metallic glittery silver.

Ready to ride! You can see the mountain bike in the back that we used for harvesting parts. The spokes were black and we sanded them and painted them, and the pedals were also from the mountain bike. (which we found in the trash 2 weeks ago). Even since this picture was taken, Kyle has done some more painting and detailing. He even went riding with me yesterday. He rode mom's pink bike with the streamers. He said, "confidence is everything!"

We really do have hobbies now. Fishing and biking. It's great!

This is from a recent night-fishing trip at one in the morning. I caught 3 babies and Kyle caught the big daddy!

And here's kyle sleeping in "our bedroom" soon enough I'll have everything moved in.
Off to take my last final! Finally!

Top Ten Tuesday

2010-04-27T21:42:00.000-07:00

Here are the top ten things that Kyle and I talk about A LOT.

10. Math. Kyle's math class is hard for him, but he's getting a B, so I don't see the big need to talk about what grade he'll get if he gets a 16% on his final. We.Spend.Hours.
9. Food. We are only at the apartment Monday-Thursday, then we stay at mom and dad's Friday-Sunday. So food is really difficult to keep around (not spoil) at the condo. We are constantly like, "hurry up and eat that pudding, it's almost the weekend!"
8. Working out. Kyle really wants to get buff again, but has no time to work out. He's lost about 15 pounds since we met because he used to be on a high-calorie diet but we can't afford it anymore. Plus he has a job now and doesn't have time to eat and pump iron 24/7. So we always have this convo-"If you didn't know me, how would you rate my arm size?" "If I didn't know you, I wouldn't care." "Cara Joy, this is serious." ugh.
7. Wedding stuff. I just would rather keep it all in my head than talk about it. Too stressful.
6. Tank Tank Tank. Tank is a new guy at Kyle's work. And he's big, black and sassy. I won't say I hear about him too much, but Kyle really thinks he is hilarious so I always get a good Tank story in the evenings. "Tank was really jealous of that sandwich you made me with the bacon. His girlfriend likes bacon. Did you know you can buy bacon with foodstamps?"
5. Bikes. This really happened-Kyle saw a boy on a nice pink beach cruiser. So he yelled out his window, "Hey, I'll give you $100 for that bike!" The kid responds, "But how will I get home?" Kyle says, "Oh, I'll drive you home, man!" Kid says, "I can't ride with strangers." Kyle realizes the kid is probably younger than he looks and drives away feeling like a creep.
4. Jewelry. Kyle insists that we need to send in my ring to have it attached to the wedding bands and re-dipped. But I don't wanna be without it for so long. We also bought his ring on Sunday. It took about 30 seconds.

It's tungsten. Never scratches (that is a weird word to spell) or bends and if your finger swells up, they have to freeze it a shatter it with a hammer to get it off. Very hard core. Weighs a lot too. I don't prefer the black, but it's his ring.
3. Married life. The other day I told kyle to put on his wedding ring and pretend to be married so I could see what it would look like. So he put on an impromptu skit grabbing a glass off my dresser. "Yeah, my wife's gonna kill me if I keep doing these guys night out at the bars. Especially when she finds out it's a titty bar. Yeah, I gotta get my son to football practice. And my pain in the neck daughter spends all my money." I was like, "Never do that again."
3. Addresses. I lost all of the addresses I got when I sent out my save the dates. So now I am starting all over. It made Kyle very mad to have to call everyone again. hehehe
2. Fishing. Enough said.
1. Babies. The other day I ordered Kyle a credit card on my account so he can pay bills online and I don't have to do it all. I gave him clues to guess what it was. This is what he came up with after putting all the clues together. "Ok, it's valuable, but free. And someone could try and take it from me...A baby!" "Kyle, You forgot the clue about it coming in 4-6 business days..."

Not Me Monday

2010-04-19T21:16:00.001-07:00

I did not have to hand wash a pair of boxers and a pair of work socks for Kyle. Because we definately do know how to use our weird washer at the apartment. And we definately don't use mom and dad's washer to wash all of his clothes. We didn't have too much fun this weekend to remember to do laundry.

Kyle was not passed out cold by 10:30. I did not spend all day sick at school just wanting to spend time with him to only get an hour of seeing him awake. I am not ready for school to be over.

I did not just realize I forgot to bring his dirty laundry home tonight. I do not suck.

I did not just finish Emma by listening to it on cassett tape in my car. I read the whole book. I did not feel a twinge of anticipation every time I got in my car, wondering what would happen next.

I did not go an ENTIRE 2 weeks without the radio. I am not impressed. When the tape was over, I did not continue-and still don't continue-to get in my car thinking of how excited I am to listen to my story, only to find that I already finished it.

I did not LOVE the reader's voice. I did not think to myself, "she sounds young, and pretty. I bet her friends are jealous of her awsome job. I bet she lives in London and is super cool."

I did not pack all of this in Kyle's lunch.
~PeanutButter and Honey sandwich
~Turkey, bacon and cheese sandwich
~Orange
~Baby carrots and celery with ranch dressing
~Fruit roll up
~Three whole wheat easter egg M&M cookies-fresh from the oven
~Pudding cup
~Whole Wheat Cheeze-its
~Peanut-butter crackers
~Lemon Bar
~Bottle of lime-aid
~Bottle of water
I am not worried that he'll still be hungry. Because he won't be.
I do not feel guilty for loving Rhianna's new song-Rude Boy.
Even my friends at school were not like, "that song is bad, I miss when she was innocent."
I was not quietly humming it to myself. It is not a horrible song that does not get my toe tapping.
I did not have a group project meeting that began with us laughing at how the professor wears cat sweaters followed by EVERY SINGLE person NOT taking out their phones and passing around pictures of their cats and not telling cute stories about our cats.
Last night at dinner I did not say to Kyle, "If you want to order salmon, you need to say it right. Don't pronounce the L." To which he did not reply snidely--"I have always pronounced it SALLLmon."

Cute Baby Kyle--just thought I'd share cuz his stepmom gave me a TON of pictures of him.

I did it

2010-04-13T20:23:00.000-07:00

So today I finally did it. I ordered my cake. I don't know why I was putting it off so much. I guess I just felt that the fact that the publix I am ordering from didn't answer their phone was a sign from God. Then today when I was like, "ok, do it!" it said their number was disconnected. So I went to my local Publix and got the exact price/size of what I wanted and found out that the publix was re-built (since the last time I was there?!) and for some reason they were like, "new look, new number." So I got the number and drove out there and picked it out. I am going to bring them ribbon to put around the bottom of the cake and it will be delivered a half hour before the reception starts because nobody wants them delivering when everyone is there in their way and whatnot. So here is the picture I chose from, but mine will not be fondant. (because it is 50% more expensive) It will be white with a little bride and groom on top with black ribbon around each tier's base.

I also bought a cheap garder today to throw. It's blue. I bought a bikini to wear on my honeymoon and not until then. I bought a giant frame to put a giant picture of Kyle and I on the eisle in the entrance of the hall. So today was productive.

Then I went to work and found out someone had given me the wrong schedule and I was supposed to work 12-4 not 5-11. So to make up for that mistake, I was forced to work drivethru until 1030. People are so rude. So rude. I do not have the strength to do it. I cried when I got home just because I had to let out all of the pent up "Gahhhh! I am not the stupid one! Why do you hate me?!" that I had built up. School tomorrow. Then next week is the last before finals!

I Love You!

2010-04-08T19:03:00.000-07:00

when im hungry you cook. When im sad you cheer me up. When i need a hug your there with open arms. When im tired you take naps with me. When i need help with home work you teach. When i need you your there. When the house is dirty and im tired you clean. i looked for a best friend and there you were. You do so much for me and i am so greatful for all of these things. I Love you now, ill love you forever. First United Methodist at Cocoa Beach 7 weeks 3 days 17 hours 10 minutes See you there. ill be waiting :)

Strange Monday

2010-04-05T09:39:00.000-07:00

What a strange day this has amounted to. It all started with the shuttle lift-off and 6:21 am. Actually is started last night when I ate too much Easter Candy and could not fall asleep.

Let me make a brief side-note about how our family reacts to shuttle lift-offs/landings. When a shuttle leaves the earth, it shakes everything within 20-30 miles. Shakes, like that weird feeling you get when everything is quiet and your phone vibrates on the table and it's loud and shocking and erks you. When it comes BACK intot he atmostphere, 3 loud booms occur. That is the sound of it passing through the...atmostphere. Last time the shuttle came back, it was scheduled for 10:21 pm. I was not prepared and had little-known of its return until earlier that evening. So at 10:21 on the button, 3 loud booms shook the windows. I jumped up and yelled, "William, William, William!" (Because that is what I call him when things get serious)and he said, "Get me a knife, I need a knife!" While he swept the perimeter of the house, mom came out all befuddled from having been awoken by the banging and insisted that it had been a teenager (because she hates teenagers) banging on her window. I argued that it had been on the livingroom window. Eventually we looked at the clock and went back to our lives.

This morning, however, I was very-well prepared for the shuttle to lift-off. (or so I thought) Kyle was planning to wake up early to watch it since the apartment is across the river from the station. So, at 6:21 I was awoken from death by the house shaking with a terrible fury and the sound of a giant freight truck in my bedroom. I ran into the kitchen yelling, "Daddy, Daddy!!" Brinkley walked in and looked at me. Then I remembered the shuttle and assured her that it was ok. (to which she probably thought, yeah I know) and I went and called Kyle. He said "It was amazing!! There were 1000 people in the feild next to our apartment! So I stuck my head out the window and said, 'Hey! When does this dang thing liftoff?!" It must have been amazing because it was the loudest I think we've ever had. Anywho, on my way to school this morning, I was 30 minutes late because of all the tourists and their dang traffic. I cannot understand for the life of me why so many people from Ontario and Connecticut drove allll the way down for 19 seconds of entertainment. Nope. I got counted absent even though I showed up and did my presentation on less sleep that normal.

Strange Monday indeed.

The things I never shared

2010-04-04T18:10:00.001-07:00

Recently I was in bed, but not ready to sleep. So I watched all of the videos on my camera. These two caught my eye because I never watched them once they were filmed. They seem pretty basic from the get-go, but they have they cute/hilarious moments. This is Holly's birthday song. The best part is Nolan's face in the first 5 seconds. I gaurantee if you keep looking at him for the first 5 seconds you will understand why I am posting this. He's adorable...and terribly confused.

This one is just funny. Like, "why?" Jr is very nicely reading the nativity story and Steve and Gabby can hardly contain their excitement over all of the festivities. So they take time to do an awesome high-five for the camera. I just think it's cute. The Steven comes over and looks at Kyle (who is filming) like, "hey, stranger. I want to sit with my aunt Cara, and you're in my way." And Jack's yelling is great. And this Christmas was all-around just aweosme :)

Then there are these. Priceless treasures. Gabby picking toe-jam out of her toes. She brought a tissue so the task would be more bearable.

Top Ten Tuesday

2010-03-23T21:51:00.000-07:00

I know it's not technically Tuesday, but I haven't gone to sleep yet and this is to worst time for me missing my kitty. Here are the top ten things that remind me of him.

10. The picture of him that I have hanging in my kitchen at the condo. It is to single, solitary thing we have hung on the walls and I look over at it when I do the dishes.

This isn't the picture, but it is a pic of him sitting in the same chair.

9. His hair in my guitar case. Whenever I played my guitar, I could count on him to lounge around in the case. Rather embarrassing whenever anyone asked if some animal had exploded in my case, but utterly adorable.
8. Tuna fish. The night after I found out he was dead, I was making Kyle's lunch and he requested Tuna and crackers. You can guess how that went down.
7. The empty can of wet cat food on the front porch. I set it out one day last week when I thought he had just gotten lost. I'm pretty sure by now Brinkley has licked it out, but it's still there.
6. The computer chair. Whenever I couldn't find Emmitt he was sleeping in the computer chair. It was the last place I would look and I could always find him there. He's the reason we have a sheet over it. His hair was ruining it. Now there's just an unexplaned shet on the chair.
5. A cardboard box under the spare bed. It has big grooves in it and it sticks half-way out from under the bed skirt. Every time I walk in at first glance I think it's Emmitt's tail. I finally kicked it all the way under the bed. It got me every time.
4. Lost animals. The other day I was driving home from school and saw a lost dog with a collar. He was pretty big and I wouldn't normally have stopped but I was afraid he would die and someone would find out the way I had. So I pulled over and he almost came to me but then saw another dog and ran away.
3. My bed. This is the one that gets me. Every time I go to bed I think of how I would usually go and find him and bring him in my room for bed. He would act annoyed that I had disturbed him from wherever he was but he always was glad to snuggle.
2. Pheobe. When I hear her padding through the house I think it's Emmitt. It's not like the two cats were inseperable or anything, but every time I see her now she just looks very lonely. She sleeps in strange places behind chairs and stuff. Maybe she's confused or as lost as I am.
1. These pictures from when we first got him.

Thanks Leah for the card. It was really funny and what you wrote was very nice. He really did have a great life with me. <3

Emmitt and I-2007

A little less spring. A little more break.

2010-03-14T22:20:00.000-07:00

It's way too late to be up on a school night. But spring break is over and I have little to show except some well-needed rest and an uncharacteristically sad demeanor. Over spring break I...
~Watched Nolan's First Steps video 5 times. (oops, just watched it again, 6).
~Mopped my floors at the apartment and after realizing that it was too cold for them to dry quickly without me being stuck on the counter for an hour, I crawled around on the floor with paper towels on each knee and hand until the job was done.
~Cooked 3 delicious meals.
~Baked banana bread.
~Cut Kyle's hair.
~Worked out twice.
~Trashed my bedroom.
~Saw Alice in Wonderland.
~Had lunch with the girls.
~Went to two flea markets and purchased sunglasses, hand sanatizers and old candy that tasted like a flea market.
~Went to an estate sale. I must make a note of this one. EVERYTHING in the house was for sale and we were NOT the first people there. Things were strewn everywhere. Closets picked through, kitchen cabinets flung open and poured out. It was so weird and FUN! The owners just walked around picking stuff up and we did NOT buy anything but it was a great experience.
~Realized that Earnest Hemingway is positively the most boring and morose writers I have ever had the non-pleasure of reading.
~Stayed up too late and slept late, too.
~Layed out in the sun 0 times because it was either too cold or pouring rain.
~Turned the clocks forward. Last year I did NOT turn the clocks forward and was totally out of wack.

Going to bed and starting a new half of the semester. It will be so fast and so eventful. My mind is too tired to contemplate its vastness.

Just our daily bread

2010-03-07T22:34:00.000-08:00

Just read a bunch of my old blog posts. Most were about being stressed out and promising myself that by next halloween I would have a new boyfriend (fiance...whooda thunk?) and these criptic sentences about "face-melting drama." I wonder what I was talking about. Stressed? Did I even know the meaning of the word? Face-melting drama? Nope. I mean, sometimes I feel left out when I know my friends are going out creating drama, but then things like today happen and I don't anymore.

Today we had our first marriage counseling. Just a casual lunch with pastor. My favorite part was when Kyle had to list 4 things he liked about me. Whenever I ask him to do this he comes up short, but under pressure he did well. It made us feel good to talk about the future of marriage. And it reminded me of what pastor said today in church. So often we pray for our weekly, monthly, years-in-advace "bread" instead of just saying, "lord, give me what I need today--my daily bread to get me through to tomorrow."

Right now I feel like I want to have it all together. I want some fortune-teller to tell me that Kyle and I are gonna be great and prosperous and never have to choose between groceries and electricity. But all I can do--all I should do, is ask God for my daily bread. I just need us to get through today. And God will handle tomorrow.

Cribs-Cara & Kyle

2010-02-27T13:06:00.000-08:00

This morning I worked until 3:30 cuz mardi gras is swiiiiinging. But that's not the point of this blog. Kyle woke me up way too early and we ran uncharacteristically entusiastically outside to see if the mail had come, which it hadn't. But the mail lady was across the street delivering their mail and honked at me so I ran over. She said, "Waiting for this?" and there was our envelope full of keys! (dead bolt, handle, gym and mailbox) Woohoo! So we went and bought some cleaning supplies and got some keys made and popped over and filmed this little gem. I have to work tonight and the electricity won't be on until monday but tomorrow we will probably get some more stuff moved in. Kyle is also getting his chevy impala from his dad today so he is gonna be fixing it up all day over there. So I spent some time alone in my apartment wiping out all the drawers with lysol wipes and putting some dishes away that Kyle will use for the next few months. I'm in love. I feel old. Like, "my kitchen" "my stove" "my washer". Anywho, here it is. MTV CRIBS comes to TITUSVILLE!

Wedding Nightmares

2010-02-17T09:30:00.000-08:00

I have had a few wedding nightmares recently. One was quick and strange about how I didn't have a dress to where. But it came from a real problem...I am not just having these dreams for my own amusement. My alteration lady is out of town-back in Vietnam visiting a sick relative. Thus--the dream..

My most recent one, however, was long and oh-so-realistic.
I was at the reception which had many smaller rooms where I would walk through and sit and talk with a few guests that I didn't know and who were all old. Kyle was sitting in a chair in the corner of the ballroom and I was hanging out with this gay guy I went to high school with. When I heard the dj playing classic rock for all of the old people to dance to, I went and asked Kyle if I could buy myself an alcoholic beverage. To which he obliged so I bought myself a mixed drink that was about the size of a cough-syrup dose. I asked the old-lady bartender with the butch haircut if I could have more and she said no. Then I realized that the old lady was also the dj. So I asked her to please play some dance music. So she turned on the Cupid Shuffle-which I love. But she would not turn it up when I asked her to. Then mom and dad came and I asked them to dance with me and at that moment I had a heart-stopping realization. The photographer had never showed up. Mom said, "yeah, I noticed he wasn't here and that's why I've been miserable all day. It ruined the wedding." And I just kept saying, "Oh my gosh...Oh my gosh." And she said, "let's give everyone disposable cameras to quickly take some pictures." Then I woke up. .

This dream happened because my photographer took 5 days to get back to me about the contract and only just now has sent it to me. And the disposable camera thing was something I read on a money-saving forum. Somebody actually did that instead of hiring a photographer. Oh and the classic rock...that was what I told my dj never to play. I don't know about the old people.So I had to type this blog to get out my pent-up frustration. What if I really DID forget that he hadn't showed up to the ceremony until the reception and he never called and I never even noticed he hadn't showed? I won't even think about the possibility anymore.

Top Ten Tuesday

2010-02-16T19:22:00.001-08:00

Here are the Top Ten things that I have realized recently.

1. I LOVE LOVE LOVE granola. I have always liked to buy yogurt parfaits, ya know, with the fruit and the granola that you pour in and it's all crunchy and sweet? So the other day I bought some low fat vanilla yogurt and some of this.

It is delicious and all natural and I put it in a little cup of yogurt with strawberries or just with the yogurt itself and I have eaten for dinner for the past two weeks. I love this stuff!
2. Nolan's latest blog posting made me realize what a little peanut he is. No really. See?

3. I am getting an apartment in less than two weeks!
This is something I discovered but more...realized is so fast approaching. Wow! I can spend my time cleaning my kitchen and decorating and making Kyle dinner. And I am jealous that he gets to live there before I do!
4. My sleep habits are...wiggity-wack. I sleep about 7 hours on Sunday/Tuesday nights because I have an early class. And allll day I think about how I'm gonna take a nap when I get home, which I hardly ever do, since I don't get home until about 7pm. But when I do, I sleep from 7 until about 830 when Kyle comes home from class. And it is weird. Then all the other days I sleep until about 10am and it is great--and weird.
5. I am going to be able to WALK places in my new home. Though very run down, there are two malls within two blocks of our building. One has a theater in it and an outlet that I like and the other just has a JCPenny's. There is also a Village Inn that Kyle says is "going to be our place" when we're married. ...yum?
6. I am so happy to have Dominique living back home. Tonight she just popped over after dinner to bring me a gift. It's a cute little painted ceramic sign that says "Never forget to kiss each other goodnight." and it has a wire hanger with beads and is very sweet. I will hang it somewhere appropriate in my new home. She is so sweet. I'm glad she hated living in St. Augestine :)
7. I am tired of cold weather. My body is shriveling up. Kyle heard on the news that it was colder in Texas last week than it was in Antarctica. My face is peeling and flaky from the dry cold and I object on the grounds of superficiality to the weather. I cannot live like this.
8. I am a great waitress. My work is really into "secret shoppers" and "if you get a rudeness complaint, you're fired" so when a woman called my boss's boss to tell him how wonderful a server I was, he sent the call to his boss and I received a letter from some Steaknshake guy saying that they value my membership on the SteaknShake team and they want to thank me blah blah blah...I was presented with the corny letter today and it had a copy of the woman's address who made the call to compliment me. I think I will visit her :) I gave a dramatic acceptence speech and threw it away. My work is so lame.
9. I love my major. When I do my creative writing homework, it takes a long time not because I dont know what I'm doing, but because I am so into it that I don't want it to stop. I hate that we aren't allowed to write more than one page for each assignment. They are supposed to be short and sweet but this week I had a story that I so wanted to develop but had to stop. Then when I read it to Kyle and I finished he said, "What?! Why was she like that, why didn't her friend figure it out?!" And it made me feel good.
10. This is the most important one. I realized just yesterday why God had me change my major. I used to want to be a journalist because of the books I'd read about savvy females in their late twenties who were sexy yet lonely living in London or New York and drank champagne with their best girlfriends on the weekends and I wanted to be like that. Then I realized that journalism is a lifestyle. You have to constantly be living in the mindset "is there a story here? I wonder if that guy would talk to me about...whatever." And now that I am an English major I just have this weight lifted. I used to wonder if it was the right choice but now I see why it is. Instead of crying and stressing over my next story and my interviews I have time to help kyle with his homework and we have time to just shutup and watch a movie without thinking constantly about the horrors of school. God gave me a major where I can do something I love in school and have the time to do what I love outside of school. I still stress, of course, but I really do feel like he needs me in this tough time where he's trying to decide what his purpose is. And I think that's what being a wife is all about.

St. Valentine's Day

2010-02-14T18:03:00.000-08:00

Kyle and I had a wonderful St. Valentine's Day. I made homemade mashed taters, country fried steak with gravy and roasted asparagus. For dessert I bought fresh strawberries, whipped cream, vanilla ice cream and shortcake and special glasses to layer them in. Delicious! Kyle got me a giant box of chocolates with some other candies and a teddy bear with the year on it in case we forget what year we had our first V-day--haha.

We Got It!

2010-02-13T09:15:00.000-08:00

Here are a few pics of our new loft. Kyle will be moving in on March 1st! It has never been lived in before so we are excited to break it in!
The first few are of the outside pool area and the gym and game room, which is being renovated.

Big Sunday

2010-02-08T08:49:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a big day for Kyle and I. (And I'm not even talking about the superbowl!) We went to church...a little late, then went to the hospital to visit grandma.

I had been hesitant to go because it was such a major surgery and I was afraid of being in the way and I was afraid for some other reason that I can't put into words. It was just...scary. But we went to visit and Aunt Deb was there along with some weird people from church who like grandma more than she likes them. Grandma was having a delicious fruit platter and enjoying it and without me even asking to see her leg she hoisted it right up in the air with a grimmace and a grin. I didn't know how to reply, really. I just said, "wow." But with more of a sad wow than a super! wow. It had bandages around the end and was cut about mid-shin and was something I had only seen in movies. We left after about 20 minutes of talking about rehab down in melbourne and telling her how nice it will be for her to be able to eat dinner at her table insetead of propped up on the sofa because her foot is hurting too much. It was nice to see her doing well. I don't really worry about grandma in a hospital because she has been through so much and is so strong through it all, but it's difficult to go to hospitals for me, I guess.

I remember talking to Leah about it and she said that to her hospitals meant new babies so she didn't mind being in them, but to me hospitals make me feel queasy and I feel nervous and sterile.

Well, then we went to Chilis for lunch and just ate and talked for a long time and I really enjoyed just chatting with my man.

Then we went to Kay's in hopes of finding the perfect bridal set to go with my engagement ring and we did! Kyle was indecisive about his ring so we will get it next month, but mine is so cool and different! Kyle actually doesn't like it much, he said he wishes it was more traditional because he doesn't want people to judge it. I don't care! It is actually called a diamond enhancer and goes on both sides of my ring. It is pictured below and was spread apart for my ring to fit in, but will be tapered and soddered at the bottom before the wedding.

The best part was being able to take it home and it already fits me perfectly so I got to try it on for mom who said it complimented the ring nicely and aunt Deb who said "they have such different rings nowadays" and dad, who was unimpressed and just looked at it like it was a peice of junk mail. Oh well!

Then we went to see Dear John, which was a Nicolas Sparks book that I read on Thanksgiving and it was a lovley, sappy movie.

Then we went to walmart for something er other and caught the last quarter of the superbowl at home. KYle didn't much care to watch but he was glad the saints won and that I was nice enough to make him homemade fried chicken fingers and fries with homemade honey mustard.

We hate mondays but tomorrow we will hopefully find out if we get our apartment that we want! The approval/denial should be in by then.

Early Birthday

2010-02-01T15:53:00.000-08:00

I wish I had thought to take a picture of the breakfast in bed that Kyle brought to me Sunday, which was the day I chose to have the familial celebratory custom of my birthday because the actual day of my birthday is on Tuesday, which is the night Kyle has Algebra class and dad has church meetings. Kyle always stays the night on Saturday nights because we have church in the morning. But this particular morning mom was wearing her especially loud cowboy boots clomping around the house, so I awoke an hour and a half early and went to the bathroom before going back to bed. But before I could get to the bathroom, I was intercepted by Kyle who, upon noting my awakeness, went into a panic and followed me back into my room to instruct me to stay there. So half an hour later he entered with a tray of blueberry pancakes, bacon and fresh strawberries with a little bowl of sugar for dipping. He had his biggest smile on and watched me eat it. He may have enjoyed it more than I did, he was so excited!

This is what happened after church:

The family gathered 'round.

I made a wish

And got exactly what I wanted!!

When you love cereal as much as I do, dispensing it becomes one of your biggest joys.

These are my awesome canisters. Kyle and I had a very serious discussion about what to put in the smallest one. I think it's obvious that brown sugar goes in it because we don't drink coffee or eat traditional rice. Then he argued, what about oatmeal? To which I said, you can put your oatmeal in your half of the cereal dispenser. To which we both marveled and had another moment of joy over that cereal dispenser. It is the coolest.

These are my awesome dishes. They are porcelin and VERY heavy! Everything is square, even the mugs. Mom is gonna get us another set so we will have 8 of everything. I like that idea because then Kyle and I can each eat for 4 days straight without washing dishes...jk.

And you may notice the shirt I am wearing in my birthday pics. It is from Holly, an early birthday present. Thanks Holl for the shirts!

Dad thought it impossible to drink from a square mug, so mom and I had to try. It is an exciting new experience. Dad also insisted that if we were to put chocolate-covered raisins in one side of the cereal dispenser and trail mix with m&ms in the other side, it would be the best use of the dispenser that he could fathom. We almost agreed.

Oh, and a big red bowl! I must have registered for this because it is so fun and I just remember having that big yellow bowl as a kid that didn't match anything so I thought, this is more of a serving/fruit bowl and grandma said it would be perfect for popcorn. (But in my head I just thought...I hope this doesn't turn into our puke bowl...)
Tomorrow for my real birthday, KYle took the day off from work and is taking me a shopping spree to the Florida Mall in Orlando and that is where I will be spending the gift card that Leah got me. Thanks Lee. Then when Kyle goes to class at 6, I am going out to sushi with Dominique and Heather. Can't wait!

Wednesday

2010-01-20T09:12:00.000-08:00

I just opened blogger wondering if I would find a new blog post and thinking, while I'm here I'll do a Not Me Monday. But, alas, it's Wednesday. We had Monday off from school and Kyle and I stained a coffee table that he found on his way to work. Mind you, knowing full-well that I had gone to bed at 2am in celebration of my Monday off, he called me at 6 monday morning to tell me he loved me and, "oh, P.S. I found a coffee table!" I was anti-thrilled. But he got off work at one and came over and we bought some stain and stained the heck out of it. I'm gonna buy some trays to put on it so we don't hafta use coasters and it will look great! We have another coat to do and he is still considering just painting or going darker but it's our first furniture together! We are also hoping to find an apartment by the end of the month. The loft we wanted went bust because the guy who owns it lives in Miami and keeps blowing us off. We've looked at a few places but whenever Kyle sees "a thug" he says, no way you're living here. (as if it would just be me). But we have 4 new prospects we are hoping to see tomorrow on my day off so fingers crossed we'll have somewhere to put all the crap that has been piling up in my closet. Having a bedroom is just no longer suitable. Where am I supposed to put my measuring cups and my HP SCANNER/PRINTER? What about my magic bullet and my mixing bowls, not to mention the crack pot? (oops, I meant crock pot. Because I don't have a crack pot in my closet.)
Anyway, I do have some poetry to analyze so I will be doing that now. Happy HUmp day!

I have made a decision

2010-01-13T10:22:00.000-08:00

Today I went to lunch with one of my possible photographers. He has been my first choice from the start but then I found out that I won a $500 prize from another (very overpriced) photography company that I saw at the bridal show. So, anyway, I LOVE his work and he is the best there is so Kyle and I are gonna spend a little bit to get this guy. He's a friend of a friend so he's throwing in a "story book" which is like a beautiful bound book of glossy pages of pictures from the wedding. Like a novel of beautiful love portraits, if you will. Here is the link to his facebook. He just quit law school so he is just now beginning to build a big web page for his breathtaking pictures. Just scroll down and look at his wedding photos, not his profile pics cuz those are all of him. DJ this saturday to tie things up then just cake and loose ends...and oh wait, a freaking honeymoon vacation to remember for a lifetime.

oh, and i stumbled across this uncharacteristically gangster picture of kyle and i in my phone. i don't know why it happened but i'm glad it did. because it's funny.

update sun-mon

2010-01-12T07:01:00.000-08:00

We Went to a Bridal Show on Sunday. At a bridal show there are tons of vendors (photographers, cake makers, limo services) and you have a booklet with all of their names and contact info and in order to put in for the grand prize (a honeymoon to the bahamas) you have to have each vendor sign next to their name in your booklet. EVERY VENDOR. Then in case you dont win the grand drawing, you can apply for door prizes from each vendor. And I won a beautiful centerpeice!

It's about a foot and half tall!
It was so much fun. We ate lots of food and watched a dance show put on by one of the dj companies and learned a lot about all the work I have to get done before May!

Yesterday was the first day of school. I have a 50 minute class at 9:30 then nothing again until 330! So I drove home and watched a movie, did some online crusing and hung out with Kyle for an hour. Then went back for phase two. I only go to class monday and wednesday this semester so today Kyle came over to "work from home" finding clientel on the interweb and we're gonna go apartment shopping later.

I am running the printer ragged printing out all of the my syllabi for school. (The plural for syllabus is syllabi, yeah)

Anywho, off now.

Not me Monday

2009-12-06T21:49:00.000-08:00

It's 50 minutes into Monday and I can already think up a hefty list of things I did NOT do in the last 24 hours. (Because last Monday I sat down with every intention of writing one of these and could not think of anything...)

I did not work late, which did not cause me to explain to Kyle that I could not go to church because I was not too tired. I am never too tired to wake up for church.

Kyle did not come in my room 10 minutes before church and try to RIP me from my bed.

I did not take advantage of a moment where he lost his grip and definately did not roll to the other side of the bed in a protective ball and I did not fall back to sleep.

I did not make fun of the nativity movie clip shown in church today because all of the actors did NOT have British accents. I did not lean over to mom and dad and say in my LOUDEST British accent whisper, "Blimy! A bloody baby was booorn to the city of David, blokes!"

I did not hide a speeding ticket that I got on Thanksgiving night only to have my radar detector taken away by Kyle. I did not then cry for him to give it back. To which he did not say, "No. I love you too much."

We DID however play scategories today. And when grandma grew impatient with grandpa and began yelling at him to hurry up so we could start the game, I did not say, "Grandma. You waited 70 years to play this game, you can wait 10 minutes." Everyone did not laugh hysterically. Her face was not priceless.

One of the scategories was not "Things you keep hidden" starting with the letter "K". Ian's choice was NOT "Kondoms". We did not laugh for 10 minutes before telling him they start with "C"...not to mention he should not know anything about them at his age.

I am not forced to write this blog at 1am because I did not decided to do laundry, to which I did NOT add my only set of sheets, which I do NOT need to sleep in tonight. I would never do that. They are NOT not even close to being dry.

I'm not falling asleep.

Kyle's sister did not have her baby today at 1:17! (ok, she did and we're so excited)

The first thing he said to her when she called was not, "How did it feel to lose 7lbs, 1oz in 10 seconds?!"

Another Christmas Miracle

2009-12-04T20:55:00.000-08:00

Every year we get those presents. You know the ones. Mine are usually marked "C Joy" in old-fashioned cursive, but there is one thing they all have in common; each and every package promises to hold something that you never would have known you wanted until it was staring you in the face. Last year we had quite a ball with grandma's gifts. From the giant sausage (yum) to the travel-lotions there was little to be desired. Here is a link to it in case you need to get back in the spirit of things. Anywho, we started early this year. The two presents of the 10 she sent were...marvelous? mysterious? Musky. That's the one.

Well, for starters they came with a letter of explaination that started with: Dave, here's the thing.

What the box encapsuled was 6 vintage avon collectables. Apparently, in another era, Avon was the premier place to get cheap cologn in tacky and completely unrelated vessels.

ahem.

This one is called Avon Stop and Go. And the scent is "Spicy". Well, obviously. There's nothing that singest the pallet more than a traffic light. mhmmm.

This one is called Windjammer. It appears to be a zamboni with golf clubs in the back seat. (Which come seperatly and you have to attach them yourself) Apparently it is some old-fashioned golf cart, and did I mention it smells divine? Bet you weren't expecting that?

So, all in all, while we munched on the Girl Scout cookies she sent, we have enjoyed our Christmas that much more. Grandma's gifts are always so fun and, well, perplexing. Perhaps when we open the other 4 Avon bottles she sent we will find "tangy tank engine" and hopefully a "musky minivan". This is fun!

My Mechanic

2009-12-03T10:13:00.000-08:00

Latley my car is at that stage. I got it in May and it has been a perfect angel ever since. That is, up until a couple Saturdays ago.

I came out to my car to get some lipgloss or whatnot while on a 6-2 shift at work. (that's 2am, mind you) Coming upon my car, I noticed my right front tire was flat. So flat. So I called Kyle (waking him up, because by this point it was past midnight) and he came within 10 minutes with his compressor (or whatever it's called). He pumped up my tire and showed me how to measure the air pressure and to know what the number should read, then he said he would leave the compressor in case I had to blow it up again before I left. (To which I said, "I'll just ask some guy who works here to do it for me." To which he said, "You never ask another man to do something YOUR man can do. You call me before you leave.") So by 1:30 my tire was flat again and he bought a can of FIX-A-FLAT (workswonders) and pumped it up again and drove it to my house, with me following in his PT cruiser. He stayed the night since it was 2:30 by the time we got home and changed my tire the next morning.

I use wayy too much wiper fluid so he has had to fill my fluid-holder-thingy twice since then.

The week after the tire incident my oil light blinked a couple times then stopped, so I ignored it. Then it did again a week later. So last night at 9oclock I asked Kyle to check my oil thinking he would get to it this weekend. No. At 9:30 we were driving to Wal-mart because I needed a complete oil change. My oil was so low that it wasn't even touch the end of the dipstick. ugh. Not to mention that by 11:30 he had finished the oil change and cleaned everything up before realizing that he forgot to replace a washer that had fallen into the oil bucket. So he had to start over. Jack up the car, empty the oil, replace the screw. Jack DOWN the car, replace the oil, clean the driveway.(But I won't mention that). Then he apologized for messing up.

After reminding him that he didn't have to change my oil in the first place so he had no reason to apologize, we had a wopping 15 minutes to relax before we were too tired to entertain ourselves and he went home. I am so thankful for Kyle and his interest in cars.

If I could have recorded the things he was saying while changing the oil it would have sounded something like this..."Cool!" "Wow, did you know your car did this?" "I love these fuel filters!" (genuinely, he enjoys stuff like this.)

Additionally, go HERE to see our official wedding website. Updates to come...

Top Ten Tuseday

2009-12-01T10:09:00.001-08:00

In the spirit of Christmas and finals, I have HUGE tasks running through my brain. It's sort of my own version of the 12 days of Christmas...
5 BILLS TO PAAAAAAY
4 Finals, gay!
3 gifts to do
2 papers due
And a Wedding to plan by late Maaaaaay.

Anyway, my top ten Tuesday consists of the the itty-bitty umimportant things that have no actual necessity yet keep creeping into my to-do list...

10. Lately I have been craving The Office. Over the past two weeks, whenever I get a quiet moment in my room to put away laundry or...sleep, I put in the office. I started with season 3 and am now on season 4's second disk. I can't get enough. I just have to know if Jim and Pam will truly make it...ugh.
9.I spend my class times as of late making schedules of when the final will be, rather than hearing what the final will be on. I spent American History reading a chapter in my journalism book on Rush Limbaugh and found that he is a douche. And yesterday I went to walmart for no reason whatsoever and bought Kyle a long john shirt (cuz he loves those and he truly needs shirts) and rented a movie from redbox, and bought a ginger bread house building kit (even though last time I tried to build a gingerbread house I cried because the bloody thing wouldn't stand up)
8. I have taken to looking at our Christmas pictures on facebook very often, like 3 times a day. I just think we all look so cute and happy and the tree is so pretty. I wish I had more comments on them because I just think they are so fun!
7. I like to sit on the couch each evening and see if something Christmasy is coming on. So far this year I have taped the Grinch and am making a Christmas special VHS. I could buy a christmas special dvd but it would inevitably have something worthless on it like Rudolph or Santa Claus is Coming to Town (Both dismally lame Christmas specials that seem to haunt me). So I am making my own personalized one with only my favorites. It has Garfield's Christmas and the Grinch, and next Tuesday at 7pm I will be taping Charlie Brown's Christmas. This is clearly very important.
6. Instead of pulling my hair back in a ponytail or Heaven forbid, blowdrying it after a shower, I french-braid it. Sometimes one, sometimes two, and the occasional 3 corn rows. I have gotten very good at this. It is a huge waste of time because I never leave the house in french braids unless I do funky ones for work. Waste of time.
5. (The following is a specific example and is not condusive to my everyday routine) Thanksgiving day we needed to bake the pineapple casserole and cranberry bread while mom took Brinkley for a run. That was our task. But I had been dying to try my hand at turning my out-date very loose-around-my-behind Abercrombie khakis into skinny-leg pants. So I got out the sewing machine amidst Kyle's cries that "I love those pants on you! You'll ruin them!" and turned them inside out and sewed a line down the leg. When I tried to put them on I could not fit my foot through the hole so I threw them in the back of my closet and will probably not rip the seam out for a long while. Of course, then I finished my tasks in the kitchen.
4. I saw a movie Trailer for a new Nicolas Sparks book-turned-movie called Dear John. I noticed that mom has the book in her closet so, following suit of the last 3 book-turned-movies of Sparks', I decided to read the book first. I began reading it on Thanksgiving's eve and finished by 3 o'clock on Thanksgiving afternoon. I could have been writing my personality profile, reading chapter 15 of my history of American Journalism book or perhaps reading one of the 5 chapters of my American History book that I have a final over next week. But Dear John really had to be read before the movie comes out in...good lord...February.
3. I fold my underwear before I put them in the drawer...but I don't bother to put my socks in pairs before putting them in their seemingly bottomless drawer. Somewhere there has got to be a rule against this.
2. I was very excited to get out of American History early so I could rush to the library and...blog.
1. I like making folders for things. I made a binder for wedding planning, a folder for final reviews and a folder for our december trip. But I am having trouble finding papers to put in our december trip folder other than our itineraries so I have taken to printing out coloring pages for us to do on the plane when we get bored. I swear, I really have important things to do.

Double-Take

2009-11-24T07:41:00.000-08:00

It's hard to explain how my mind works. Sometimes when I look at pictures of the kids I am reminded of some funny picture or random person and I have never taken the time to share the similarities I notice. Holly's post today inspired me because there was a perfect picture of Nolan that set it all off.

If you've ever seen Zoolander then you know that Ben Stiller has these "looks" that he is famous for. And this is what I am reminded of when I look at the following picture.

See? Like he's striking a serious pose. But cuter!

Here's the next one.
Gabby's new haircut!

And the American Doll I pictured in my mind...

Ok, next. This is fun, right?
Steven's smile looks eeeeeerily similar to someone else's...

Ok, so it's not eerie at all, but I just noticed the up-turned chin and the slightly squinted eyes. See?
Jack-Jack

Big, blue eyes and a soft, round belly! So sweet!

That was fun.

My sisters never blog anymore.

2009-11-23T11:33:00.001-08:00

My new post section is like a ghost town :(

I have a Turkey and Swiss sandwhich that I can't eat because im at the library and it would be weird to eat a sandwhich at the computer. I'm starving.

Got my school financial issues sorted out today, just waiting to sign up for classes.

I cried after skype-ing with the Koper Clan last night because I wish I lived nearby.

I'm going to eat my sandwhich in private.

One more day of school this week then one more holiday until Christmas. Cannot wait for Christmas vacation.

Kyle and I...we look the same

2009-11-20T13:15:00.000-08:00

Here are some recent pictures of us. Doing stuff.

Sunday Nap

Lookin' handsome registering for square dishes.

Week Update

2009-11-19T20:44:00.000-08:00

Things we did this week

~Last night I decided we should make Christmas cookies. When I got all the cookie cutters out I let Kyle pick out the shapes. He picked christmas trees and Texas. Not exactly Christmasy but...we doused them with red and green sprinkles, so he ate them all.

~Last night Kyle got his bike back with a surprisingly-cheap fix. He pulled in the drive and said, "She runs like a brand new machine!" The things he says...

~We would usually go to the gym 3 times a week seperately and since we have had our joint membership we have gone twice so far this week. It is so funny how different it is. He's always looking around to see where I am and when I'm on the treadmill I watch him do his weights and he winks at me :)

~Tonight Dad said, "Where's BK? Is he eating here tonight?" And I was confused so Mom said, "Oh, that's cute! Like, 'Big Kyle'" and Dad corrected her, "No, it stands for Billy Kyle." So that's his new nickname. Thanks dad. Billy Kyle...aka BK. no.

~Today Kyle had a long break between classes and I was gonna come home early to hang out with him. So for the 2 hours he was waiting for me to get home, he went over to my house and took a nap in my bed. When I got home he had just woken up and was laying in my bed eating two hot ham and cheese sandwhiches that mom had made him. Wow. Future mother-in-law of the year award.

~This morning when I woke up, as with every morning, Kyle called me to talk about what our plans were for the evening. So he asked in his chipper morning person voice, "Are you ready to cuddle tonight?!" PAH!...I guess.

~Today I found this old burnt cd with some unidentified handwriting on it that said CARA MUSIC. I put it in and we listened to the first song, "Austin". Then the next two songs were "I'll be" and "I can love you like that" so we slow danced in my room and mom got annoyed at us and closed my door. When mom and dad can't stand the gushiness, you know you're bad.

~We watched Twilight tonight because I really want to go see New Moon this weekend. He kept asking me questions throughout and really loves the movie. Did I mention it's HIS movie that we watched? Did I mention I had to remind him to bring it over from HIS dvd collection? Yeah.

~I'm writing my last news reporting feature on a Vietnamese man named Han (Mr. Hank). He owns our local nail salon and his best friend is a Vietnam war veteran who is his next door neighbor. When I asked him what he and his wife do for fun he said..."We doo kung-fu!...een the back yahd!" He is so funny and they are great Christian people. His wife always reminds me to say hi to Holly for her and tell her that she looks just like me. So, "Hi, Holly!"

I have 23 hours and 54 minutes until my 4 page essay is due on the environmental changes from the 17th-19th century. Better get started.

If you're feeling like a pimp

2009-11-13T07:06:00.000-08:00

I wrote a pretty cute mini-blog post about our dinner with Kyle's Dad and Step-mother. But I decided to delete it in the spirit of Christmas...and the fact that it was overloaded with sarcasm.

Last night we were talking about when we were younger and used to go out to the clubs and Kyle said, "I always hoped there were no 'uncle stans' around when we were trying to dance."

So, I said, "Who's uncle stan?"

And he was like, "that's what we call creepy guys, like, 'look at that uncle stan over there!'"

So I said, "well you're not aloud to call them that anymore." Hahaha "...for family reasons."

PS: Favorite comment received on facebook in regards to our engagement..."wow...how long have you guys been together :\"
OH, haters, you are everywhere. I'm fine with it because we knew it would happen. People think we're too young and silly. But we just know, and I have a shiny ring to ease the pain :)

I dare you to understand the words to this song Here about being blind to haters. It's bad-a** with a touch of reggae and soul..but my favorite...

HERE'S another...because last night mom ACTUALLY told me to get the dirt off my shoulder after I was pissed about...well, haters.

My favorit from this video is the girl with the lambo whose all, "Don't hit on me. I drive a $500,000 car. Take that, wanna be."

We're Engaged! November 10th!

2009-11-10T18:40:00.000-08:00

That's the ring inside the yellow rose. Favorite :)

I'll write it like a romance novel...but more true.

Kyle held the roses behind his back when Cara asnwered the front door. The sun had just set, leaving the porch dark with only the street lamp illuminating the night sky. She thought about turning on the porch light but decided against it so she could steal a kiss without the neigbors seeing. She couldn't even see his face when he gave her a long kiss saying, "I love you so much."
"Give me whatever it is you have behind your back," Cara said, glancing behind him.
He showed a dozen red long-stemmed Holland roses with one bright yellow rose in the center. She took in the sight, distracted by his tense whisper as he began to kneel saying, "I can't wait any longer." Before she knew it he was on one knee before her grasping at her right hand. As he asked those four precious words and she squeeked out a yes amidst tears, she said, "That's the wrong hand, honey." He fumbled with her left hand then found his way. "I'm so nervous," he laughed. Then he hugged her and she couldn't tell if she was laughing or crying. Tears were streaming out of her eyes but a deep laugh escaped her lips as he held her. For the rest of the evening his hand would find its way over to her left ring finger, and he would softly run his thumb over the top of the ring; as if to remind himself that she really was his.

The End (or...The Beginning)

Reception Hall

2009-11-07T13:06:00.001-08:00

It's funky. It's got a gold, reflective ceiling, which I assume is for lighting quality at night and big air vents that snake around. Despite its quirks, I like the large, central dancefloor, the lower level for gifts, the bar and more space for gifts and the possibility for improvements all around. I saw at least 384749 places I could string twinkle lights plus I was lucky enough to walk in on a weddin planner decorating chairs, which I loved. So here are some pictures.
The first one is of the dancefloor on the upper level. DJ table in the center.

The next one the chairs decorated for that night's reception. I like the idea of black with white sashes.

This one is on the lower level when you first walk in. To the left behind me is the bar and next to the stairs is the gift table, then to the left will be the guest book and whatnot. Love? Not yet. Excited for potential because I know I have a few crafty sisters and 3 bridesmaids to help out? Absolutely!

Top-Ten Tuesday!

2009-11-03T18:19:00.000-08:00

I love to do a top-ten tuesday. It makes even the worst ten things about my day seem better if not cohesive.

Today is a top-ten tuesdasy about sayings. These are sayings that Kyle says, most of them being sliiiightly different than what I am used to hearing. And they make me laugh every day so I am sharing them for you.

10. Healthy as an ox. (This one is from a previous blog, but it is most popularly known as "Healthy as a Horse.")
9. It's hotter than a jalepeno's coochie! (This one...I can't correct except to say that it's probably made up...)
8. It was harder than a diamond in an ice storm. (This one isn't wrong. Frankly, I've never even heard of it...but it makes me laugh every time.)
7. I don't want to put all my chickens in one basket. (Obviously the correct phrase is "eggs is one basket" but Kyle was just getting ahead of himself.)
6. He was dumber than a doorknob. (Dumber than a doornail.)
5. I'm just jackin' with you. (Just joshin' with you.)
4. The words are at the end of my tongue! (Tip of my tongue.)
3. Is your Daddy a glass maker?...get outta the way! (I remember this one as a kid. Leah would say to me when I stood in front of the tv, "Cara, you make a better door than a window...)
2. You're as loud as a bull in a China-man's closet! (Not even sure if I've heard anything like this one...ever.
1. Just a teaspoon a day will keep the...will keep you healthy! (Hahahaha, this one is the cutest.)

Not Me Monday

2009-11-02T17:51:00.000-08:00

Today was one of those days where I certainly did NOT get significantly less done than I planned. It is definately Monday

I did not accidentally push out way too much gel deoderant so decided I would just wear all of it, only to realize that it did NOT get all over my BLACK workout shirt.

I did not quit in mid-weightlifting to run to the bathroom and try and smear off all of the excess gel with a wet towel.

I did not feel very uncomfortable as I looked at the weight bench next to me to see my ex-boyfriend's best friend. I do not think he kept looking at me. I was not suspicious when he got on the treadmill right next to mine. There were not 30 others open! I'm not paranoid.

I did not tell myself not to overthink my decision to change my major. Because going to college has got NOTHING to do with thinking.

I did not reminice with a classmate on told school poster from when I was little. My favorite one was not "What is right is not always popular, and what is popular is not always right" that one was not in a very close tie with all of the "Garfield Talks Grammmar" ones.

I did not come home from work and have green bean casserole for dinner then decide I was going to puke.

Kyle did not sit behind me the whole time telling me "You can do it, honey." He is not wonderful and very tolerant of my ailments.

I did not leave the bathroom without puking and decide that I needed a 6 o'clock nap. It was not WONDERFUL to sleep until 7:30.

Kyle did not just say, "you ready for pumpkin pie?" That does not translate as "you ready to get me a peice of pumpkin pie since you don't like it and it happens to be my favorite?"

I did not do any of these things.

Pumpkin Carving!

2009-10-27T14:48:00.000-07:00

Aint he cute...he was so excited. I took this picture to get a shot of the perfectly plump pumkin.

Glowing Pumpkin watches real pumpkin get carved...fears for his life.

Glowing Pumpkin tries to take his own life (This story going down while Kyle works tirelessly...)

Just kidding, he just poses for the pictures after we intervene on Glowing Pumpkin's near tragedy.

The eyes are in place...

Finished Product! (Kyle named him Jack and I didn't protest though the name is clearly already taken.)

Kyle walked in this morning and said nonchalantly, "How's Jack?" And I said (after a moment of thought) "He's fine." Then we went about our business.

We took the light out of Glowing Pumpkin and put it in Real Pumpkin, and Kyle tried to take a bite out of the pumpkin top after I cut it out. He's so cute.

Quotes from the night:
While drawing how I might like to design the face..."Well that looks just like a horny toad and you don't want our pumpkin lookin like a horny toad do ya?" -Kyle
"(laughs laughs laughs) "What's a horny toad?" -Cara
"You know what a horny toad is. It's a toad with horns that can really getcha! If you're not careful..." -Kyle
"Woman, get your damn hand away from the knife!" -Kyle (I think he may have said this a few times. He only curses when knives are involved.)

THE END!

The "W" Word

2009-10-25T13:03:00.000-07:00

Today I chatted with Leah about wedding stuff. Centerpieces and what have you...

Here is what I have so far. I got the idea from Instyle Weddings and couldnt find the picture on their website so I just took a horribly blurry picture of the article...whatever. Here it is.

So, a simple idea that could use some expanding...but I am very happy with the candlestick holders I have so far. They looked so pretty when they came out of the dishwasher :)

No Reason

2009-10-19T15:43:00.000-07:00

I finally got frames for my pictures of Nolan...that would be his 3mo pictures...thank God, now that he's more than doubled that age. Anyway, I have my neice/nephew shelf all set up with my fave pictures of the kids. Thought I'd post a picture...

Then on a completely differnt note, I got all my cabbage patch dolls out after mom had me mail Gabby's birthday CP doll. It was so funny remembering the Christmas or Birthday that I got them and how I played with them. They all pretty much still had all the right clothes too!

Also on the random front, shockingly I found these "pony and puppy surprise" toys that Holly and I got for christmas in England. I can't believe all the puppies/horsies are still there! (The one horsie is missing due to Beau chewing it up as a puppy. But I am beyond proud of my child self for not losing the other two).

Cheeks

2009-10-14T13:57:00.001-07:00

This has been a rough past two weeks. One weekend I was in the hospital and the next, Kyle's face was unrecognizable after his wisom teeth were ripped out by a Dentist using nothing but novacane for his SEVERLY impacted teeth. I have had such a hard time with the face thing because...I miss it. Is that wrong or sick or something? I love him just the same, but I miss kissing him and being able to hold his face in my hands when I'm talking to him. Here is my MOST FAVORITE and LEASTE FAVORITE pictures of Kyle. For obvious reasons, the poor thing.

This is my favorite picture of Kyle. I took it the first week we were dating. He was humoring me by holding still long enough and it turned out to be the best one.

Here is my leaste favorite picture. He took this the second day he was home from getting his teeth out. His cheeks felt like they were filled with acorns, all hard and very hot like they had fevers in them. The swelling is going down now and today is the first day I saw his cheek bones. Here comes a new weekend...it's looking pretty bright!

Strange Friday

2009-10-09T11:25:00.000-07:00

Yester day I skipped school. My first class is pretty skip-able, my second class was not in session because we have an online test and my third class I was going to have to miss anyway due to a Dr. appointment. Sooo I spend to morning wih Kyle because he finished his 8AM test in 6 minutes then high-tailed it over here for 4 hours of chillin before his next class. Then he came over after his other class to say goodbye. He drove 3 hours north to Savannah to get his wisdom teeth taken out by his Step-mom's dad. He owns his own practice and does his family's teeth for free if they're willing to drive up.

Kyle was very proud of his SEVERLY impacted wisdom teeth. He said, "My dentist said I have the deepest roots he's seen in 30 years!" I was very worried because this step-grandpa is not an oral surgeon which means there would be no anestesia...just morphine and novacain. Plus I have only gone two days without seeing Kyle since...forever so today is strange to say the least. He doesn't get any service up in the middle of nowhere so all I get are random texts including a gruesome picture of his swelled up face and "My jaw hurts. That last one didn't come out easy." yuck! So hopefully he'll come home tomorrow.

Tonight we're doing mom's birthday at Grandma's. They are making me a special dish since I can't have most of the stuff mom wants. (Goolash and Pumpkin Pie) I can't have any seedy veggies or anything raw including fruit and veggies. (especially tomatoes) so I will probably have...bread. I have lost almost ten pounds from this jello/sprite/bread diet. I should patent it. (JK the liquid diet was the pits!)

I have an online test as I mentioned...and you would think since it's online I can use the book and ace it, riiiiight? Wrong. I took the first section of it last night after about 3 hours of studying and BOMBED it. It was timed, 35 minutes for 22 questions and I blew it. American history before WWII is so boring to me. I don't care about...Cabeza De La Casas and Pocahontas' affair with John Rolfe (My teacher curses disney whenever we talk about her).

PS-last night I had a wedding dream. (thanks to the office and the magazine mom bought me when I was in the hospital which i looked at until i fell asleep) It was in our church in Japan and I was sitting in the side aisle crying because dad wouldn't play the song I wanted to walk down the aisle to. I called him a meany when he said "in ten years this won't matter!" I guess that's true...that's what I was thinking when Pam's veil ripped. oooh and I loved the dancing wedding. so fun!

Weekend wrap-up-Warning, unless your last name used to be Marsh, you may find this oddly boring and strangely touching. Sisters, read on.

2009-10-04T21:16:00.000-07:00

Friday was the morning from down under (not the one with kangaroos and dingo babies). 4:30 am...wake up having a nightmare about the paper I have due monday. In my dream, no one will listen to me when I say I have a stomach ache and they all just keep yelling about how we're all going to fail this paper. When I wake up everything's real except the people. I AM freaking out about the paper and my stomach is KILLING me. I lay in bed, go to the bathroom then decide to lay on the bathroom floor moaning with a heating pad on. After an hour and a half I crawl into mom's room (my word she's a deep sleeper!) I cry and cry and she gives me pills that make me feel better by 7:30. I watch 20 minutes of a disney movie then go back to sleep til noon. Then the fun happens. I notice blood where it shouldn't be. I am calm and go to webmd.com where I am made less calm when it tells me to put down the darn computer and get to the hospital. I wait until 8pm when mom and dad are at a football game with friends and I see MORE blood. I leave it there so mom can look and call her crying. She and dad race home and find me in a ball on my floor. (I had been looking for my wallet under my bed and couldnt get up). Mom checks the blood and says "omygoshomygoshomygosh" amidst my cries and dad's silent preparations. With backpacks in tow we drove to the hostpital. I couldn't believe how alone I felt without Kyle. He was in Orlando spending the weekend with his dad. He called when we were on the way and I told him and he came straight over. By the time he got to the hospital I had a bed in the ER and was about to be checked. The pain was AWFUL. I have never felt this way. I cried when anyone touched me. Mom, Dad and Kyle took turns because only two people were allowed in the room with me at a time. Kyle was always there and it was just mom and dad switching. By 1am I had a catscan and an IV and some pretty good drugs. I was very talkative and boisterous. Dad seemed very confused and Kyle and mom just laughed at me. I distinctly remember playing with Kyle's nose, but that's all the detail.

Saturday: We'll switch days now even Friday is not technically over. By 5am, mom and dad went home and Kyle and I were shown up to the room. (actually i dont remember going to the room). We slept about 2 hours each and watched movies and napped all day. His grandma came to visit bringing me books. Mom brought me like, 10 magazines and a glowing pumpkin to decorate my room. It was so nice having sweet Kyle at arms' length all the time. For 72 straight hours he was telling me I was beautiful and kissing my super pale cheeks and bought me flowers. When he walked in with the flowers I thought he was just going down to the car. The instant he walked in with a big smile on his face proudly holding out the flowers I said, "I need to puke!" And to that he said, "aww, poor baby...look what I..." I interrupted, "GIVE ME THAT TRASH CAN!" I promise I thanked him later :)

Sunday: Sunday was better. Kyle and I went to be around 11 and slept straight until 6 with no interruptions. Then we slept between nurses until 930. His grandma and aunt came again and everyone stared at me for a good 15 minutes before (thank God) they left and I was not being gauked at. They said I could go home since there was no more blood but if I wanted, I could stay. Honestly, I should have stayed. I was getting this wonderful pain medicine that knocked me out and made me loopy and here at home it is far more painful. Plus with food in front of me it's harder to maintain my sanity. I cried when mom brought home friend chicken for dad and Kyle. Cried. That's the actual correct spelling for pathetic.

I learned a lot about love this weekend. Mom and Dad were so worried I could FEEL it. Kyle never grimmaced when doctors were talking about stuff I would have rather NEVER told him. But love is more than butterflies and expensive dates. He held back my piggy tales when I was puking up potassium and brushed my hair after I washed it out. He let me take this picture of him with these glasses I found at work and had in my purse. When we got home he told me I smelled like hospital and let me sneak a mike&ike candy when mom wasn't looking, as long as I promised to just enjoy the flavor and promptly spit it out, which I did. Tomorrow, more drugs, doctors and...disney movies when I get home? yes. Sorry this is so freakishly long. The phone is not my friend this weekend. So I will tell you now.

You know it's a good weekend when...

2009-09-27T20:49:00.000-07:00

Like all good things, this weekend has come to an end. In ten minutes it will be Monday. I will check my school e-mail account, check my grades for the classes I don't like and study for a test I would just as soon not take, if given the choice.

However, looking back, I knew this moment would come. Like today, when Kyle tried to talk to me about school and some test or whatever...I said, "shhh, it's still the weekend for 9 more hours." I win.

Friday did not count as a weekend. I had from the time I wok up until midnight to write a 4.5 page essay on how native americans were affected by colonization and how europeans were affected as well....wake up, I promise not to mention school work anymore. I finished it by ten, not before taking a two hour break to make dinner (pizza rolls and mozarella sticks) for Kyle and I and played with my cabbage patch dolls.

Saturday I ran a bunch of errands for mother...namley mailing an ungodly surplus of packages to Abilene, TX. I looked like some cartoon character at christmas time. Five boxes stacked, teatering as I made my way into the post office. Post offce workers, I have gathered, are the rudest more begrudging people. eck.Took a nap and when Kyle tried to wake me up I rolled over and elbowed him in the eye. He then took a picture which makes it look terribly awful and wayyy worse than it acutally was. It is fine today.

I then spent the day with Kyle until I had to work at 6. He took my car home and detailed it (inside and out!) then returned it to me saying, "sorry if the headlights are still a little foggy, I'll fix them tomorrow." Pah, what a sweet!

Good money at work, however I could not sleep due to lack of company in spacious/creeky house. I was up until four and awoken at 8:30 by hungry lab. I was not perturbed, however. I went back to sleep and woke up for church with Kyle then a long day of beach, The Office Season 1 and Taken. (the very first and only movie that Kyle and I have every fully watched outside of movie theaters.) Grossly dissapointed in the ending. How Kim was all, "thanks for saving me from human trafficing, dad, I'll call ya later! Oh, hey mom, sweet one-shoulder sweater-blouse! Isn't the same one you were wearing the day you sent me off to my drug-indused doom?"

You know it's a good weekend when...you cry when it's over.

Top Ten Tuesday

2009-09-22T10:26:00.001-07:00

There are times when reverting back to childhood sounds all too tempting. When stress is getting the best of us, we like to remember the simplicity of childhood. Here are the top ten things I would rather be doing.
10. Watching Arthur. That silly Aardvark taught me how to spell "aardvark" and kept me entertained after school for years. HERE it is for you forgetful or too old ones.
9. Eating baked goods. I always had some kind of cookies or cake after school to ease the pain of third grade spelling or fifth grade arithmatic.
8. Arranging my stuffed animals. I often came home to a perfectly clean room. (thanks to homeschooled-holly and her boredom) Some of my greatest memories are of coming home and mom and holly had painted my bedroom or the time they set up my very own desk or bought me a new comforter. I would then spend extra time arranging my toys perfectly in their new habitat.
7. Riding my bike. I loved playing outside in the cool fall air in Nebraska in the evenings...then coming inside to watch #6.
6. Watching Fresh Prince. This was a pre-dinner tradition. All three of us girls loved it and Leah and I would practice reciting (spittin') the theme song.
5. Packing my lunch in my Winnie the Pooh lunchbox. I loved packing myself a delicious medley of peanutbutter sandwich with homemade cookies, a thermos full of kool-aid and maybe some yummy fruit snacks. And sometime mom would write me napkin love notes. ahhh, those were the days.
4. Having my hair done each morning. Every morning Holly and I would pick out our bows and barrettes from "the bucket" and line up for hair duty. I often opted for the two braids and Holly often loved the "poof bang" look.
3. The bell. As a kid there were only two bells. Beginning of the day, and end of the day. And I always got so excited at the end of the day. Mom would be waiting outside in the Plymouth and Holly and I would meet and walk back together in our matching blue and pink spring jackets or our hornets winter coats. (bleck)
2. Taking Baths. Ahhhh, I took baths and only baths until I was 11. Now a bath is like, weird and random and only when I'm sick or depressed. And I ALWAYS take a shower first.
1. Watching the disney channel. I could spend all evening watch Disney Channel Original movies and I always looked forward to the Friday night premiers.

Overall, I think I will definately have to take part in some good old fashioned cookie-eating and reminiscing with Holly when I get home.

Top Ten Tuesday

2009-09-15T08:09:00.000-07:00

It is only 11:09 am and I already can think of 10 things that I have melted down about today. Whenever I have a melt-down, I hone in on certain aspects of myself that are just utterly abomanable and come to near tears over them. In my most recent (10 mintues ago) meltdown over the fact that I forgot my transcripts in my car, I then poured out my self-pity sorrow on the nearest ear.
10. My weight. "Not only am I a forgetful whore, I look fat and frumpy today in my maternity shirt."
9. My face. "I am so forgetful that I fogot to bring makeup to school, now I am sweaty and melting and look afright."
8. My sleep. "Now I will never be able to sleep more than 6 hours a night because I will be so busy remembering not to FORGET anything else."
7. My overall intelligence. "I am so dense. I cannot believe how stupid I am in forgetting those transcripts. I will fail college undoubtedly."
6. My relationships. "I am sorry that I am such a weirdo complainer and I understand if you would rather ignore me for the rest of the day."
5. My sanity. "Maybe I should go to therapy this week. I think I am falling apart."
4. My future. "Today is not just any Tuesday. It is the Tuesday that could ruin my future if I dont get my act together and start being a better student."
3. My commitments. "I might have to quit college because my hair is going to start falling out."
~3a. My hair. "Not only am I as forgetful as one, I have the hair like one. I was running out of hairspray this morning and now I am a frizz!"
2. My grades. "My grades are going to suffer because I am too stressed to study so now I must blog."
1. My Precipitation. "I have to calm down now or am I going to start sweating. And if I start sweating then I will look disgusting and smell. Now I might cry. I have to get off the phone now or I might start crying."

Meltdowns are a common but rare side effect of journalism school and you should not take them if you are pregnant or may become pregnant. Common side effects include crying, whining, pity parties and self-loathing.

I am fine now. Plus I took this funny picture in the library moments ago, in honor of The Office starting on Thursday.

THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID

Not Me Monday

2009-09-14T17:44:00.001-07:00

Today is Monday.
I did NOT do a lot of things.

I did not eat an extra bowl of cocoa pebbles with the reasoning, "I am sad because the weekend is over and I hate Monday." More generic cocoa pebbles for me!( i think these are called chocoalate gravel or something unimaginative).

I did not waste 15 minutes this morning trying to take the perfect picture of my hairdo.

I did night drive 20 minutes in the opposite direction of school to go visit Kyle at BCC for 15 minutes.

I did not have a serious self-debate about wether or not I should entitle my newspaper article about parking lot f, "WTF"

I did not seriously consider skipping the gym. To which my man did not argue that I should just wait until tomorrow. To which I then did NOT win the arguement with, "either I cook you dinner tomorrow or go to the gym tomorrow. Pick"

I did not NOT wear deoderant to the gym then make myself leave early because I was NOT afraid that I smelled.

Some Texan is NOT reading over my shoulder and is definately NOT repulsed by that last one.

I did not beg Kyle to plug the camera in to this archaic computer so I could post a picture. The USB port is not in the far back of the computer. He did not do a lovely Aussie Crocodile hunter accent as he burrowed underneath the desk.

I do not think I love him.

For Posterity

2009-09-09T20:18:00.000-07:00

Today I found out that my financial aid has not "posted" yet. I paid $200 and hope the other $1700 will soon be "posted" by my financial aid friends.

Today I found out that I am not actually accepted into UCF because I never handed in my transcripts...gotta get on that.

Today I found out that I am NOT the only one who feels like a failure in News Reporting class. EVERYONE is a failure. PHEW!

Today I had a 2 hour class to attend and somehow spent 6 hours at school. Sick.

Today I had to be at work 20 minutes after I arrived home from Orlando. I hate driving.

Today I looked at a REALLY nice apartment but cannot bring myself to peace about one.
God, bring me a peace.

Today, I just realized, I forgot to get off work when Holly is here. Grrrr.

Today, I have to be out the door to school in 7 hours and I have not begun my readings for tomorrow's possible quiz.

This blog is for posterity. When I say to myself, "What was my first semester at UCF like?"

It was just like this...(lkdfjiojgilnfijsine<3lkfnasgifng<3lksfa)

Sort of like climbing a mountain? It sucks on the way up, then once you reach your potential it's all downhill. And at the bottom, what you've always wanted...and the greatest feeling of accomplishment. I'm on the way up.

Top Ten Texas Tuesday

2009-09-08T19:16:00.000-07:00

Hey, Ya'll. I got the idea to do a top ten tuesday last week but as a true testiment to the fact that NEVER get anything done with Kyle around...I am doing it today. So here it is; the top ten things that he says that make me melt...in a hot Texas summer popsicle on the fourth of July kind of way.

10) "All riled up" He says this whenever I get tempermental or hyper. Use: "Don't get all riled up now, Cara Joy."
9) "Beastie" This is an "Azle" word (the town he's from) that means, awesome. Use: "I like that shirt, it's beastie." Side note: he hasn't used this word since I laughed at him when he said it when we were first dating. :(
8)"Healthy as an ox" Last night Kyle said my eyes looked like I was getting sick...then he took my face in his hands and ever-so-lovingly whispered, "but you're as healthy as an ox." bahahahahaha (I held it in, I swear)he was just so serious.
7)"Ready" (pronounced red-eye) Use: "Are you red-eye?"
6)"My Lady" The other night I don't even remember what we were saying but he said, "Well, of course. I've gotta take care of my lady."
5)"Missy Tight Pants" This is one that he adamently denies using. I was getting an attitude, of course. And this is what came out. "Alright, Missy Tight pants just wait one minute!"
4)"Oh, Honey" He says this a lot for no reason. Just because.
3)Yesterday I was gonna meet his dad at our Labor Day barbeque so as a surprise Kyle took me to get my nails done. He sat next to me and watched in awe the whole time like a sweet boy then said, "Now you don't need to go breaking those pretty nails so when we get home dont do anything hard. Just ask me." so funny when he's serious.
2)Whispers "Yeaaaah" whenever a big loud pickup truck drives by. He had an old-fixer uper at home. glad that's where it stayed :)
1)One particular day, we took his car because it was raining and as we pulled up to the driveway he stopped short and hopped out. He got down on his belly in the driveway and started sniffing some gunk on the ground apparently left by his car...I leaned out the window and said, "what's wrong?" he sniffed and said, "exactly what I thought." whaaaaaa? shock, awe and heart-pounding adorability that reminded me so much of THIS that I could not get enough. He's such a boy.

PS: AFTER WATCHING THIS, KYLE TOLD ME THAT CHUCK NORRIS VISITED HIS PHYSICS CLASS IN JUNIOR HIGH. SO THAT'S WHERE HE GETS HIS SMELLING TECHNIQUES.
After our sunrise bikeride to the inlet Labor Day Morning. He's such an early riser!

Catch a falling star and put it in you pocket...sing that song all day today. I dare you not to have a better day!

2009-08-30T21:48:00.001-07:00

Have you ever written a WHOLE PAGE blog about you day, week, random moments...then felt absolutely nothing when you delete the whole thing without publishing? I just did it. I have done it inumerable times. So I left the desktop and came to my laptop to say what I really meant to say but didn't and ended up deleting.

~I was so nervous about handing in my first assignment to news reporting class that I re-printed it in 3 different fashions changing font and spacing each time. (the assignment was to write one sentence based on a story. the sentence was to make anyone want to read the story. One sentence. So many times.)

~Friday Kyle's grandma taught me how to make Salmon steaks on the grill with butter and lemon. I had asparagus and artichokes and loved them. I had red potatoes and REAL fresh fruit salad in a poppyseed dressing with hot brownie sundaes for dessert. I sang a song for her on an old guitar they had sitting around and she said to Kyle, "Your dad is going to fall in love with her." It was an enchanting evening.

~ I am sad that the weekend is over.

~My best friend, Cybill left for college last week and I miss her so much. We talk EVERY day on the phone, text and facebook. I have talked to her on the phone 3 seperate times today.

~I cannot wait for cold weather.

A Day for Pancakes

2009-08-24T08:27:00.000-07:00

This morning I awoke from my 11 hours of slumber with a fresh outlook on Mondays. This Monday I start work on my Bachelor's degree. This Monday I start Journalism School. This Monday I start with News Reporting 101. This Monday, I am making pancakes.
My last day of summer was a sunny Sunday. I went out to lunch with two of my best friends, Heather and Dominique. Sushi. Then Heather and I went to see 500 Days of Summer and I invited my new friend Kyle. After the movie Kyle took me on the longest motorcycle ride of my life down a road on the river. Million dollar houses and the torrent river made for the perfect scenery. (Ok the river wasn't torrent but it was definately there). Then we went school supply shopping, he met the whole family (yes, including seth and adam) and he went on his way. Saturday my new roomate Sarah and I went apartment shopping and found a possible winner. We are going to look at one more and hopefully decided this week and move in next month. So much to think about, but today, just class. I am excited and nervous and anxious and hungry.

Good thing I made pancakes.

Some fun

2009-07-02T14:23:00.000-07:00

Tribute to June

2009-06-28T21:23:00.000-07:00

Movies I have seen this month(and the food eaten before, which is relevent, I swear):

The Proposal-Sushi: Funny, Stressful cuz Sandra Bullok is such a major meanie.

The Hangover-Panera Bread: Fuuuuuuuuuunny. Perfect LOL movie. Hilarious. Just...Yes.

My Sister's Keeper-Dairy Queen Blizzard: You've heard of tear-jerkers? This one pulls the tears from your eyes and throws them back at you, causing more sobbing and sniffling to ensue.
It wasn't so bad, really.
I liked it.

Someone asked for my number at a gas station. He was nice and handsome, but far too short for me...so I said, "I don't give my number out at gas stations...but I'll definately see you around." ?! He was nice and said, "Alright then, see ya."
Someone asked for my number at work and I said, "I'm not aloud to give my number out at work." (Lie) He was less kind. "Why?" "You're single, you told me. Mike won't mind." Mike is my manager, who, up to this point, has been my excuse to say no to people wanting my number. But this guy actually was a friend of Mike's and knew that I was lying. So embarassing.

Today I went out to eat with a friend and our waitress brought us bread and our drinks then never came back. Another waitress, older, scarier Sherri came up and said, "Was your waitress the pregnant blonde girl?" We shook out heads, "yes?" Then Sherri said "she left without telling anyone." We said "Well that's ok, we didn't wait too long." Then Sherri said, "No. It's not fine. I'm gonna beat the crap out of her. I am not kidding." Then we said, "the pregnant girl? no, it's ok." Sherri said, "No...I'd be happy to do it. So what would you like to order?"

I hope that pregnant girl's baby kicks Sherri right in the face for threatening to beat up a pregnant girl. So there.

If I hear Michael Jackson's "Beat it" on the radio one more time, I'm going to kill him...wait...haha I am sorry. I am. Sorry.

I bought boogy boards!
After the beach I was STARVING and went to subway to order some lunch. I said, "Do you have seafood here? (Because I have it on good authority that the Cocoa Beach subways are the only ones with seafood.) The sandwhich technician looked at me very seriously and said, "Don't you mean, Seafood Sensation?!" Oh my. Yes, of course.

I saw LL Cool J in concert and got yelled at for dancing with an MIB employee. But don't feel sorry for me. While dancing, some guy came up to my friend Heather and tried to hold her hand. She was far too distracted to care so he retreated back to his mid-forties group of cronies. Soooo funny. Still can't get the MIB theme song outta my head...mom gets mad whenever I sing it. "Here come the Men in Black...hehe"

I saw a maserati up-close and personal at the VIP parking valet at Universal. So many nice cars there! Talked to the valet boys about the crazy things they find in rich peoples' cars.

Went to Margaritaville and ate for free! Danced in front of the stage with a group of girls on vacation from London to work off all the free food! They were so cute!

All for now. What a long month. I'm tired just talking about it!

Holy Coloquialisms!

2009-06-26T15:57:00.000-07:00

After 4 drafts of my essay for admission in journalism school, I am happy. Now I am awaiting a reply from my adviser to read my clippings from previous years of school. I will mail it out tomorrow and pray that things go as God has planned. I am going to sleep until it is time to go to the movies. I am exhausted in my mind. zzzzz.
Here is the finished product...almost finished. I can promise my obsession and about 6 more re-checks before I seal, unseal, re-read and finally send out the envelope. ;(

The thing that most fascinated me about the writers I studied in my college English courses was the brief synopsis of each one’s life and achievements. Though many of the facts about each author’s education held similarities; namely, journalism degrees, the differences were in what each author chose to accomplish with such a degree. I was inspired by the possibilities afforded to such writers to deliver information to the world through so many different venues. Most wrote for news magazines and newspapers while many would go on to be reporters, biographers, essayists and novelists.
I am drawn to journalism by the possibilities its degree holds for those, like me, passionate about the written word. I am committed to learning and putting to use each facet of the dynamic subject of journalism that distributes crucial news and factual evidence to its recipients. I believe that with a degree in journalism, I will be able to reach readers by informing them of the pertinent impact of reality in current events. Rather than regurgitate a strand of insipid facts through a source, the science of journalism will give me the tools to write with accurate substance, flavor and concrete detail. Reporting the truth and writing the news based on precision and genuine passion for proof is the importance of news writing that I want to learn more about.
As a member of my high school literary magazine, I worked as an editor of submissions. In college, I have submitted articles to the campus newspaper and participated in Writers Circle meetings. I am a member and scholarship recipient of Phi Theta Kappa and have maintained Honors and President’s list for excellent achievement in my two years as a college student. If given the opportunity, I am ready to continue to work diligently toward a degree in journalism.

Phoebe-kins

2009-06-18T22:01:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Blake came over and we were sitting on the back porch. Well, I was sitting and he was hanging upside down on dad's back-stretching apparatus. And he said, very seriously, "Hey, where that other cat of yours? Patches, or...teaspoon or whatever her name was?" I about died. Teaspoon? Yeah, his excuse was "I knew it was something weird."

I have been taking pictures of her enjoying her new home for Holly to see and I finally got the one I had been trying to get so now I can share!
The places she likes to sleep...

Wanting to come in from lounging on the porch with Emmitt.
This was so funny. Making Brinkley wait her turn for water.
Taking her time...
They get along so well these days!

Thursday in Spanish~Jueves en Espanol

2009-06-12T09:19:00.000-07:00

I googled Thursday and one of the suggestions was "Thursday in Spanish" so I will tell you about my day in Spanish.

Hoy, Yo voy a la Dunkin Donuts con mi amiga, Heather Jackson. Ella es aqui de la Universidad para una vacaciones de trabajo y trabajar de escuela. Nosotros hablamos en los amigos de anos detras y yo como un donut y latte. Bastante para hoy. Yo soy muy cansada.

There. I doubt the verb conjugations are right but you get the hint. That's 4 years of Spanish for ya! Anyone get what I did today?

Top Ten Tuesday

2009-06-09T22:30:00.000-07:00

It's technically Wednesday now, but I work late. Sue me. (I've never written "sue me" before and it looks weird...mom)

Top Ten Tuesday

I am reading a Jodi Picoult book called "Plain Truth" about an Amish girl accused of murder. (thanks diane for the suggestion) So I decided to do top ten things that would be hardest to get used to if I were to convert to Amish...ism.

10. Music, or lack thereof. No iPod, no music channel during Sunday lazy days. No background noise while cleaning.

9. Clothes/ Modesty. Not being able to get tan arms and legs and constantly wearing an apron and a bonnet. This includes make-up and hair that I would never be able to spice-up. The men wear suspenders all the time, though, which is cute.

8. Speaking German half the time. Duh.

7. The food. Constantly having to cook everything from scratch, never being able to dine out or just eat cookies for dinner with a side of delicious carbonated drinks.

6. Facial hair. Not my own, of course. But the Men. I don't like beards.

5. Buggies. No cars to speed away in, with air conditioning and stereo (see #10). No way of getting to town at faster than 12 mph.

4. Shunning/The Bann. If a family member decides to stray from the Amish faith, he is not aloud to ride in a car/buggy with his family members, eat at the same table with, or enter the family's house again.

3. Education. Boys usually go to school until 8th grade and I don't even know if the girls can go for that long.

2. Silence. No electricity in the house would make for the quietest nights. I think of the nights when we would be snowed-in during Nebraska winters with no electricity. The nights were so silent it felt like the silence was this thick cloud seeping into your and clogging your brain. (maybe that's just me). No air conditioning, fans...eh.

1. Social Life and attention from outsiders. Being treated as a spectical while trying to be detached from the world. It must be a challenge.

I think Amish culture is super interesting and one of the most interesting things about American culture! I know Holly shares this interest...and the need for a fan to sleep at night!