Not me Monday

It's 50 minutes into Monday and I can already think up a hefty list of things I did NOT do in the last 24 hours. (Because last Monday I sat down with every intention of writing one of these and could not think of anything...)

I did not work late, which did not cause me to explain to Kyle that I could not go to church because I was not too tired. I am never too tired to wake up for church.

Kyle did not come in my room 10 minutes before church and try to RIP me from my bed.

I did not take advantage of a moment where he lost his grip and definately did not roll to the other side of the bed in a protective ball and I did not fall back to sleep.

I did not make fun of the nativity movie clip shown in church today because all of the actors did NOT have British accents. I did not lean over to mom and dad and say in my LOUDEST British accent whisper, "Blimy! A bloody baby was booorn to the city of David, blokes!"

I did not hide a speeding ticket that I got on Thanksgiving night only to have my radar detector taken away by Kyle. I did not then cry for him to give it back. To which he did not say, "No. I love you too much."

We DID however play scategories today. And when grandma grew impatient with grandpa and began yelling at him to hurry up so we could start the game, I did not say, "Grandma. You waited 70 years to play this game, you can wait 10 minutes." Everyone did not laugh hysterically. Her face was not priceless.

One of the scategories was not "Things you keep hidden" starting with the letter "K". Ian's choice was NOT "Kondoms". We did not laugh for 10 minutes before telling him they start with "C"...not to mention he should not know anything about them at his age.

I am not forced to write this blog at 1am because I did not decided to do laundry, to which I did NOT add my only set of sheets, which I do NOT need to sleep in tonight. I would never do that. They are NOT not even close to being dry.

I'm not falling asleep.

Kyle's sister did not have her baby today at 1:17! (ok, she did and we're so excited)

The first thing he said to her when she called was not, "How did it feel to lose 7lbs, 1oz in 10 seconds?!"